The Accurate Husband-Spoiling of the Tsundere Witch

The early morning village of Buena was shrouded in a faint layer of mist.

Although the sky had just brightened, the village was already a scene of bustling activity. Under the direction of the old village chief, the villagers were reinforcing the fences that had been crushed by the snow. The hunters were sharpening their rusty arrowheads, and the air was filled with the tense atmosphere of an impending great enemy.

Lynch was also very busy.

He was squatting in the courtyard, worrying over a few shriveled pieces of magical beast fur he had brought back from the northern slope. Holding a discarded copper pipe he had begged from Rhodes, he was trying to hammer and tinker, attempting to assemble the core component of that so-called music box.

Meanwhile, behind the window on the second floor, a pair of purple eyes quietly watched that busy figure through the gap in the curtains.

...Idiot.

Felsy looked at Lynch's slightly furrowed brows due to his intense focus, and the faint dark circles under his eyes left by staying up late, and couldn't help but mutter softly.

Her fingers unconsciously twirled the tassels of the curtains, and that strange feeling in her heart surfaced again.

He was clearly just a superficial husband used to cover up her identity, clearly just a tool man responsible for cooking and massages.

However, looking at him anxious about the so-called beast tide, desperately trying to become stronger to protect this home...

Felsy felt her chest tighten a bit, as if it were stuffed with a wad of damp cotton.

There is clearly no need to worry at all.

Felsy withdrew her gaze, turned around, and sat back down on the cushioned chaise longue, picking up her black tea and taking a sip with a hint of irritation.

With her recuperation during this period, and Lynch providing her with good food and drink every day, although her strength was still a hundred thousand miles away from its peak, that so-called magic depletion syndrome had mostly been alleviated.

Let alone that kind of small-scale beast tide that barely counted as a threat, even if a true army of magical beasts were pressing down on them, as long as she was willing to release a tiny bit of the oppressive aura belonging to the Crimson Calamity, all creatures within ten miles would wet their pants in fear and obediently take a detour.

This village was actually the safest place in the whole world.

As long as I move a finger slightly, those magical beasts will flee like mice seeing a cat.

Felsy set down her teacup, whispering as if to justify herself, There is absolutely no need for him to risk his life, nor does he need to go outside to hunt for any magic cores.

But...

In her mind, the determined look in Lynch's eyes before he went out last night suddenly surfaced.

This is his battle. It is also an inevitable path for his growth.

Felsy recalled what she had said to Kuma last night.

Yes.

If she didn't let him do it, that man's pride would be hurt, wouldn't it?

Moreover, his look of wanting to become stronger, wanting to personally protect something... was truly dazzling, and also made one's heart... flutter.

No! That's not right! What fluttering heart!

Felsy shook her head vigorously, throwing that dangerous thought out of her mind, her cheeks flushing slightly.

I am just... just considering the long-term benefits!

Right! It is just for the benefits!

Felsy straightened her back, forcibly activating her tsundere self-persuasion mode:

If he stays this weak, what if he encounters a truly powerful enemy in the future and accidentally dies? Then who will make red wine braised veal shanks for me? Who will massage my legs? Who will warm my bed?

To ensure the quality of my life, to cultivate a qualified and durable exclusive chef, I have the obligation to provide a little, insignificant help on his path to becoming stronger!

That is right! This is absolutely not doting! This is called... this is called employee training! It is resource allocation from a superior to a subordinate!

A logical closed loop.

Perfect and flawless.

Felsy convinced herself with peace of mind, and then elegantly snapped her fingers.

Kuma.

Here, Lady Witch~

A petite figure hung upside down from the ceiling, a half-eaten cookie still dangling from her mouth. Kuma blinked her large eyes, looking at her boss's awkward expression of although I want to help, I will absolutely never admit it, understanding it clear as a mirror in her heart.

My lady, are you thinking about how to help Brother Lynch grind monsters and level up? Kuma bluntly pointed it out.

You talk too much.

Felsy glared at her but did not refute it. That idiot's efficiency right now is too low. Running out every day to find monsters, and still having to rely on luck. There originally aren't many low-level magical beasts around here, plus the vanguard of the beast tide hasn't arrived yet... I want him to quickly gather enough magic cores, come home early to accompany... ahem, come home early to cook.

That is easy to handle!

Kuma flipped and landed on the ground, clapping the cookie crumbs off her hands. Since the monsters won't come looking for him, then we will just make the monsters go find him, right?

Make the monsters go find him?

Right! Kuma smiled wickedly. My lady, your spiritual power has recovered quite a bit now. Although you still can't control high-level magical beasts, controlling a few brainless low-level monsters is still a piece of cake, right?

You can... hehe, use your spiritual power to remote-control a few magical beasts, driving them to the village entrance. When Brother Lynch appears, you can make them throw themselves at him to die!

This way, not only do we not have to worry about Brother Lynch's safety, since you will be controlling the field anyway, but it also allows him to enjoy the training, and makes him feel like his luck is bursting... It is simply killing three birds with one stone!

Felsy's eyes lit up as she listened.

This idea... suits my wishes perfectly!

This was just like buying a motorized mouse toy that runs automatically for a kitten, satisfying the kitten's hunting instincts while allowing the owner to enjoy the fun of raising it on the side.

That is right, hmph, Lynch was pretty much like a cat she was raising!

Hmph, although it is a lousy idea, it is barely feasible.

Felsy nodded reservedly, but the corners of her mouth curled up uncontrollably. Then let us do that. It just so happens there are quite a few of these brainless things in the swamp to the west.

However... Felsy suddenly frowned, a bit worried. What if it is done too obviously and he finds out?

Rest assured, my lady! Kuma patted her chest and guaranteed. You just need to be responsible for driving the monsters over, leave the rest of the acting to me... oh no, to those magical beasts! As long as they act a little naturally, that straight man Brother Lynch will definitely not be able to tell!

A little naturally, huh...

Felsy looked out the window thoughtfully.

She used to do things like controlling magical beasts often, but that was all for conquering cities and seizing territories, focusing on ten thousand beasts galloping, not a blade of grass left alive.

Micromanagement like this targeted poverty alleviation, delivery to the doorstep, was truly her first time trying.

Interesting.

A faint purple glow lit up on Felsy's fingertips. Then let us give it a try.

...

Early the next morning, at the entrance of Buena Village.

The ones responsible for guard duty today were two village militiamen, Da Zhuang and Er Gou. Holding spears in their hands, the two were shrinking behind the makeshift wall, shivering.

Er Gou, do you think that beast tide will really come? Da Zhuang sniffled his frozen nose.

"They will definitely come! The village chief said so!" Er Gou stared nervously at the distant woods. "I heard from the refugees from Black Rock Village that those magical beasts are fierce! They bite anyone they see! I'm afraid our little wooden fence won't be able to stop them at all!"

Just as he was speaking, the distant bushes suddenly shook violently.

"T-They're here!"

Da Zhuang was so scared he almost threw his spear away. "There's movement! It looks like a group of big guys!"

The two held their breath, staring intently in that direction.

The bushes were pushed aside, and several pitch-black, slimy, and squishy creatures slowly shifted out.

Those were... Rotting Slime Monsters.

A type of low-tier magical creature living in swamps. Although they looked disgusting, they were only at the mid-first tier level, mainly relying on spitting acid and physical ramming attacks.

"It's a group of slime monsters!" Er Gou breathed a sigh of relief. "There are about five or six of them! If we rely on the wall, we should be able to hold them off!"

"Prepare for battle!"

Da Zhuang mustered his courage and roared, raising his spear and striking a pose ready for a fight to the death.

However.

The scene that followed left these two inexperienced militiamen completely dumbfounded.

The slime monsters did not charge forward in a bloodthirsty frenzy like in the legends. Instead, they stopped about a hundred meters away from the village entrance.

They lined up in a row.

Then, they started spinning in circles on the spot.

While spinning, they emitted an extremely bizarre and completely illogical sound from their bodies:

"Woof! Woof woof! Woof woof woof!"

Da Zhuang: "???"

Er Gou: "???"

The two looked at each other, both seeing the "Am I still dreaming?" confusion in the other's eyes.

"Er Gou... Did I hear that right?" Da Zhuang dug at his ear. "These piles of mud... are barking like dogs?"

"It seems... they are barking." Er Gou was also looking bewildered. "And they're barking quite... rhythmically?"

This, of course, was Felsy's masterpiece.

In her understanding, since it was a "beast tide," they were "beasts." And since they were beasts, wasn't the most standard cry "woof woof woof"?

As for biological questions like whether slime monsters had vocal cords or could bark like dogs, they were completely outside the Great Witch's consideration.

If I tell you to bark, even if you are a rock, you have to bark beautifully for me!

"Is... is this provoking us?"

Da Zhuang felt insulted. "This is too arrogant! To dare imitate dogs at our village entrance! Er Gou, let's go! Stab them to death!"

The two let out a roar, raised their spears, and charged out.

However, just as they were about to reach attack range.

The slime monsters that were barking "woof woof" seemed to suddenly receive some retreat order.

They stopped spinning, their bodies suddenly shrank, and then, as if equipped with springs, they moved with an agility completely inconsistent with their body structure, and with a swoosh—

They ran away.

"Eh? They ran?"

Da Zhuang and Er Gou missed their targets, standing confused in the snow.

"What's going on?"

Before they could figure it out, the slime monsters stopped again after running a few dozen meters.

They turned around.

"Woof woof! Woof woof woof!"

And continued barking.

The way they looked, it was as if they were saying: "Come on, come on! Come chase me! Idiots!"

"This is too much!"

Da Zhuang was furious. "Chase them!"

The two chased after them again.

The slime monsters ran away again.

This repeated three or four times. The two militiamen were tired and panting, yet they hadn't even touched a single hair on the slime monsters... assuming they actually had hair.

These magical creatures were like teasing fools, always maintaining a kind of ambiguous, teasing distance.

...

Just as the farce at the village entrance was unfolding.

Lynch walked out frowning, carrying a fine steel longsword borrowed from Asik's house.

"Da Zhuang, Er Gou, what are you doing? Why is it so noisy?"

He was originally at home studying the construction blueprints for the Magic Energy Watchtower, but after hearing wave after wave of dog barking from the village entrance, he thought someone's dog had gone mad and came out to check the situation.

"Brother Lynch!"

Seeing Lynch, Da Zhuang was like seeing a savior. "Come look! These slime monsters have become sentient! Not only do they bark like dogs, but they also use kite-flying tactics! We can't catch up to them at all!"

"Slime monsters? Dog barking?"

Lynch was completely baffled.

He looked in the direction Da Zhuang was pointing.

He saw that on the snow not far away, there were indeed five or six dark slime monsters lying there.

The very moment Lynch appeared.

The slime monsters, which had been playing hide-and-seek with the two militiamen, suddenly acted as if they had all been injected with stimulants.

Their originally lazy bodies instantly expanded a size, and the originally dim magic fluctuations on their bodies suddenly surged.

They no longer barked "woof woof".

Instead, they let out a low roar similar to "For the Horde"... although it still sounded like gurgling.

The next second.

These slime monsters ignored Da Zhuang and Er Gou, who were close at hand. As if they had seen the murderer of their fathers, or a debtor who owed them five million, they changed direction and launched a hundred-meter dash towards Lynch in a resolute and crazy posture!

Rumble!

Five or six piles of mud, each weighing hundreds of pounds, ran wildly on the snow. The momentum was actually quite astonishing.

"Holy crap?!"

Lynch was startled. "Why did they suddenly go crazy? And why are they only coming at me?!"

"Brother Lynch, be careful!" Da Zhuang exclaimed.

But Lynch was, after all, a second-tier powerhouse.

Although it happened suddenly, he did not panic.

"Good timing! I was just worrying about not having magic cores!"

A sharp glint flashed in Lynch's eyes, and the fine steel longsword in his hand flourished a beautiful sword pattern.

The magic power within his body surged and gathered on the edge of the sword.

"Arcane: Oscillating Sword!"

This was a new move he had recently developed by combining the principles of Arcane Blast. By oscillating the sword blade at a high frequency, it increased cutting power and armor-piercing ability.

Only in this way could he deal with creatures like slime monsters.

Swish!

Lynch didn't retreat but advanced instead, his figure charging toward the frenzied slime monsters like a phantom.

The first slime monster leaped high into the air, wanting to crush him with its body weight.

Lynch side-stepped and slid, sweeping his longsword upward.

Squelch!

The tough mud skin was sliced open like tofu in front of the Oscillating Sword, and a large lump of black gelatinous substance splashed out. The slime monster let out a miserable shriek and instantly collapsed limply to the ground.

Killed Tier 1 Magical Beast Rotting Slime Monster

System Prompt: Earth-attribute magic core detected. Would you like to pick it up?

"Pick it up!"

Lynch felt a surge of joy in his heart.

How were these magical beasts? They were clearly home-delivered packages!

The subsequent battle was simply a one-sided massacre.

Although these slime monsters looked ferocious, their attack movements appeared extremely stiff and rigid, as if someone was pulling strings from behind, making them crash straight into Lynch's sword.

One of them even tripped over its own feet while charging, even though they didn't have feet, directly sliding and rolling right to Lynch's feet, exposing its most vulnerable core.

Even Lynch was stunned for a moment.

"This... isn't this too polite?"

But he showed no mercy with his hands, piercing through the core with a single thrust.

Less than two minutes.

The battle was over.

Five or six puddles of slowly dissipating black gelatinous matter appeared on the snow.

Da Zhuang and Er Gou ran over with their spears. Looking at the loot scattered all over the ground, their jaws almost dropped.

"B-Brother Lynch... you're way too amazing!"

Da Zhuang's face was full of worship. "The monsters we chased for ages without catching, you slaughtered them all in two minutes?"

"Yeah! And these monsters seemed to be coming right for you, Brother Lynch!" Er Gou scratched his head. "Could this be the magnetic pull of the strong?"

Lynch flicked the stains off his sword, also looking puzzled.

"It is indeed a bit strange..."

He bent down and picked up an earth-yellow magic core, wiping off the slime. "These guys had too strong of a desire to attack, and absolutely no tactics, just like... they were rushing to their deaths."

"But whatever."

Lynch weighed the magic core in his hand, a satisfied smile appearing on his face.

"Five earth-attribute magic cores! Plus my previous stash, it's exactly enough to build the foundations for two Magic Energy Watchtowers!"

"Really good luck today!"

...

Behind the second-floor window.

Watching Lynch's beaming face as if he had found a great treasure, Felsy withdrew her slightly trembling fingers.

Micromanaging five slime monsters was still a bit tiring.

A thin layer of sweat seeped from her forehead, and her face was a bit pale, but her purple eyes were full of pride and affection.

"Hmph, what an idiot as expected."

"Getting this happy over a few tier-one magic cores."

Felsy leaned back in her chair, an arrogant yet fond smile lifting the corner of her mouth. "He should have his confidence back now, right?"

Beside her, Kuma handed a handkerchief to her boss while frantically complaining in her heart:

"My Lady... your manipulation just now was way too obvious!"

"What kind of slime monster barks like a dog! And the acting of the one that slide-tackled just to give away a free kill was way too over-the-top!"

"Thank goodness Brother Lynch is a dense guy. If it were someone more detail-oriented, they would have noticed something fishy long ago!"

However, seeing Felsy's satisfied look of having done a good deed without leaving her name, Kuma held back her urge to complain out loud.

"You are brilliant, My Lady!"

Kuma gave a thumbs-up. "Brother Lynch definitely thinks this is the blessing of the Goddess of Luck!"

"Goddess of Luck?"

Felsy gave a soft scoff and picked up her teacup, her gaze haughty and domineering.

"I am much more reliable... than some illusory deity."

"Alright, Kuma."

"Go see what delicious food that idiot is making tonight. If it's steamed buns again... I want the shrimp-filled ones."

"Understood, my Witch Lady!"