Can't Help but Transform into a "Tom Cat": The Immortal Dialogue Between the Young Lady and the President

Hmm?

Why did it suddenly go quiet?

Hmm???

Wait, didn't I just say that?

Lying on the grass with his tongue hanging out and his eyes shaped like two X's, Ye Cheng's eyes turned into two O's as he suddenly came back to life... Booting up!

Sensing the impending storm, Ye Cheng successfully booted up, though he still hadn't pulled his hanging tongue back in. He needed to prepare for two scenarios now.

If things looked bad later, he would just continue playing dead.

After all, the President wasn't like the Eldest Miss; she didn't have a habit of "flogging a corpse." As long as he played dead, he could successfully escape disaster. It was a disguised way of yielding to the President and giving her an out.

Otherwise... with the President's proud temperament, they might end up in an "offline octagon cage" for the whole night. Being beaten until dawn and turned into a bouncy, firm beef meatball would definitely make him behave...

Coincidentally.

Apart from his two major virtues of bullying the weak and fearing the strong, as well as humiliating the helpless, Ye Cheng's greatest specialty was playing dead... Bro is so good at pretending!

It could be considered a life-saving divine skill. At this point, some bros might ask: Brother Cheng, Brother Cheng, this kind of operation is too skill-dependent. Is there a simpler, more beginner-friendly strategy?

Yes, bros, yes there is. Just double-tap your temples to restart...

Just as Ye Cheng's thoughts were as chaotic as a banana violating a passion fruit, his stealthy peripheral vision successfully landed on the President.

Hmm... he saw it. He saw the President answering a call. The contact name displayed on the phone was... Self-Righteous Autistic Child.

Hmm, sounded like a troublesome opponent right off the bat. Self-righteous autistic... hmm?

Wait, something seemed wrong here?

Not sure, let's keep watching.

Ye Cheng activated his sharp eyes and keen ears, zooming in on the image bit by bit like a fine focus knob on a microscope, while his ears acted like a phone's volume button, continuously turning it up, up, up, until he was tired of it...

He saw it!

He heard it!

It was the Eldest Miss!

Ye Cheng: "..."

Ye Cheng's eyes widened. His eyes, which previously only dared to peek sideways through peripheral vision, suddenly widened like brass bells. The very first sentence the Eldest Miss said after connecting the call with the President made Ye Cheng instantly "resurrect" on the spot.

"He's with you, right?" The Eldest Miss's extremely cold voice came from the other end of the phone.

It was different from usual. Usually, the Eldest Miss spoke in an icy tone, equally uninterested in everyone. A person standing in front of her was no different from a trash can standing in front of her.

Cold, calm, without any ripples, like a pool of stagnant water...

But now.

If you listened closely, you would find that the calm water surface had been broken.

She couldn't even keep her composure for the first sentence. Even though her tone was still cold, it was enough for Dongfang Zhixia to keenly detect the anomaly.

After all... a certain self-righteous autistic child never initiated conversations. Tonight, not only did she initiate, but she also called so many times, insisting that the call be answered.

Tsk tsk tsk, someone's in a hurry~~~

The corners of Dongfang Zhixia's mouth curled up wildly. For the first time, she stood in the posture of a victor, absolutely crushing the person who used to leave her "read" and ignore her.

How could the word "satisfying" even begin to describe it?

Just as Dongfang Zhixia was about to unleash her ultimate move right in her face, telling Shen Qinghan that not only was he with her, but he was also going to spend the night, do some adult things, and also... Ye Cheng, who had been playing dead nearby, suddenly sprang to life.

In an extremely anti-physics manner, as if the sealing talisman on a zombie's forehead had been removed, Ye Cheng shot straight up from the ground with a "whoosh."

After standing up, Ye Cheng pushed off with both feet, did a 360-degree spin in the air, and upon landing, executed a light-speed Cristiano Ronaldo-style turf slide to hug Dongfang Zhixia's thighs.

Clasping his hands together, he turned into a pitiful "Tom Cat," muttering under his breath with a pathetic look on his face. As he spoke, he grabbed Dongfang Zhixia's hand and started kissing it.

Smooch, smooch, smooch...

The entire back of her hand was not spared. While kissing, he looked at Dongfang Zhixia with a fawning expression to check her status and level of satisfaction. After doing all this, Ye Cheng pitifully clasped his hands together again and began to beg.

The whole set of movements was incredibly smooth, taking less than five seconds from start to finish, conveying just one meaning...

President, I heard you don't have a son. If you don't mind...

Dongfang Zhixia: "..."

Dongfang Zhixia looked with dark lines on her face at a certain bastard who had slide-kneeled over to hug her thighs. Feeling Dongfang Zhixia's gaze, Ye Cheng kissed even more vigorously like a woodpecker, tap tap tap...

Dongfang Zhixia: "???"

Was that what she meant?

Right now, even Dongfang Zhixia hadn't noticed a detail: she... was no longer repulsed by Ye Cheng's inexplicable, sudden physical contact. Instead, because Ye Cheng was kissing her, her mood actually became joyful.

A tiny detail, a detail so small that it was almost simultaneously ignored by both Dongfang Zhixia and Ye Cheng.

Neither of them felt there was anything inappropriate about this, but that was only between the two of them. If there were a third person here right now, they would definitely let out a sharp, ear-piercing shriek.

If a certain loving old father were here, he would probably be thinking about the most convenient place to smuggle Ye Cheng out of the country, shipping him off to somewhere like Myanmar, Cambodia, or Laos...

It would be even better if they could have a "heart-to-heart" chat.

Dongfang Zhan: F*ck!!!

Unfortunately, there were no ifs.

In the huge villa, there were only Ye Cheng and Dongfang Zhixia... Oh wait, there was also the idiot hamster lying upstairs, half-dead and "disabled," happily eating little potato chips and watching idol dramas.

The corners of Dongfang Zhixia's mouth twitched up. She pulled out the hand that Ye Cheng was holding and kissing non-stop, first knocked Ye Cheng on the head, and then held up three fingers.

At the same time.

In Ye Cheng's world, the options that only he could see appeared once again. Cold, black text floated before his eyes like a light screen.

Ye Cheng: "???"

Wait, Sys, you're not dead!

It had been a while since he saw this scam of a golden finger appear. Ye Cheng thought it couldn't afford to give rewards anymore and had gone bankrupt and AFK. Who would have thought...

Wait...

Why at this specific moment?

Combining his past experiences with these choices, Ye Cheng finally deduced a terrifying fact... he was probably about to die!

Every time this scam of a golden finger appeared, it was accompanied by a "fate-deciding" multiple-choice question. If you chose wrong, you were dead meat. Several times, Ye Cheng had obtained crucial hint information from this scam of a golden finger.

Just like the last time the Eldest Miss and his dear President were confronting each other in the office, it gave a clear hint: if he chose wrong, the Eldest Miss would never come back. That scared a whole forehead of sweat out of Ye Cheng.

Of course, it absolutely wasn't because he saw the prompt indicating that a certain Mrs. Du would hate him for this, and might find a dark and windy night to knock him out, or drown him in the river, or chop him into minced meat, or beat him into beef meatballs, among other rich combo meals to choose from...

Absolutely not!

So... Sys, there were too many people outside just now, bro... no, Dad, there were too many people outside just now, your son is kneeling down for you right now, you must save me!!!

[Please accept three unreasonable demands from the eldest miss of the Dongfang family!]

[Task Reward: Human limit, qualification to learn master-level and above skills!]

[Failure Reward: Du Wanyi's revenge, Su Su's revenge, Dongfang Zhan's revenge, Shen Ming's...]

Ye Cheng: "???"

No, bro, why are there more and more people out for revenge?

Are we stacking negative buffs here?

Wait, the others I can understand, but why is my bro Doudou in there too?

Alright, bro Doudou, I didn't expect that even though you look the most honest normally, you're actually among the people who want to take revenge on me!!!

Silently, Ye Cheng made a note in his little revenge notebook for the innocent "bro Doudou," who was currently acting as a guinea pig in his own home.

Even with a heart as big as Ye Cheng's, seeing this dense list of revenge targets for failing, which looked like an execution list, he couldn't help but feel guilty and panicked.

Damn it, if he failed, would he even survive?

He'd be beaten into beef meatballs right away, wouldn't he?

The difference between the reward and the "reward" for failing the task is way too huge, damn it. Snowballing, huh? Walking a tightrope over a cliff, and if you fail, you just double-tap your temples to respawn, right!

Hahaha...

Fuck!!!

Although Ye Cheng wanted to curse someone's mother, when he remembered he was an orphan and had no mother to curse, he suddenly felt relieved... Life is like a violation; since you can't resist, you might as well enjoy it.

However... three demands seemed a bit much, especially since the system specifically highlighted them as "unreasonable" demands. They would definitely be over the line, so...

Silently, Ye Cheng pushed back two of the three fingers Dongfang Zhixia held up, leaving only one, and then nodded.

Dongfang Zhixia: "???"

"Thump!"

Alright, there was no room for negotiation. Ye Cheng ended up with a large bump on his head and ultimately accepted the President's three unreasonable demands. As for how unreasonable... that remained to be seen.

He hoped it wouldn't be something like wearing a mask and streaking down the street, which would be so exciting... ahem, disgusting!

After getting Ye Cheng's guarantee, Dongfang Zhixia finally revealed a satisfied smile. She looked exceptionally beautiful when she smiled. Of course, from Ye Cheng's perspective, it looked entirely different. She was still pretty, yes, but she now had two horns on her head, a pair of wings, and a tail... A demon!!!

Damn demon, I, the Demon-Subduing Vajra, will end you with my own hands today!!!

"If you're sick in the head late at night, go see a doctor, instead of running to my place to demand someone. Or do you think I'd be like you, staying ambiguously with a man late at night?" Dongfang Zhixia's tone was flat, laced with sarcasm, her attack power maxed out.

Her words were full of harshness.

The eldest miss on the other end of the phone fell silent for a moment...

"Yes." And then she gave an affirmative answer.

Dongfang Zhixia: "???"