Whack!
A resounding slap landed squarely on the yellow weasel’s face.
The force of the blow sent it spinning through the air in a full 360-degree Thomas flare.
"You think you get to be sacrificed? You think such a good thing would ever fall to you? Keep dreaming, you delusional little rat!"
"Huh?"
The weasel was already dazed from the slap, but after hearing Gu Qingfeng’s words, it grew even more bewildered. Was having one’s lifespan sacrificed actually… a good thing?
"Hurry up and summon the Heavenly Demon, then offer up all of my lifespan to it. Got it?"
"Wha—?"
Whack!
"No ‘whats’! Just do it!"
"Y-yes, Master!"
The yellow weasel nodded frantically, but inwardly, it rejoiced. I always knew my master was a lunatic, but I didn’t expect his madness to worsen so quickly! Today’s the day I finally break free!
Eagerly, the weasel began chanting the incantations from the Heavenly Demon scroll, its lips twisting around the eerie, otherworldly syllables.
"Hold up!" Gu Qingfeng suddenly interrupted.
The weasel’s heart skipped a beat. Don’t tell me his sanity’s returning now! No, no, no!
"Let’s move somewhere else first. Don’t want the Heavenly Demon recognizing this place."
With that, Gu Qingfeng grabbed the weasel by the scruff of its neck and vanished, reappearing dozens of miles away.
"Alright, here’s good. Start chanting. I’ll hide in the dimensional void—don’t want to scare the poor thing."
Before the weasel could react, Gu Qingfeng disappeared into the void, leaving it standing alone, trembling as it clutched the scroll in its tiny paws.
If I summon the demon and Master doesn’t come out… won’t it just take my lifespan instead?
Whack!
A pale hand reached out from the air above and smacked the weasel upside the head.
"What the hell are you dawdling for? Start chanting!" Gu Qingfeng’s voice echoed from the void.
"Y-yes, Master!"
The weasel rubbed the back of its throbbing head, smoothing down its ruffled fur before hurriedly resuming the incantation.
The strange syllables rolled off its tongue, and soon, an unearthly hum reverberated through the air—a dissonant chorus of countless voices merging into one.
At first, it was as faint as a drop of water hitting the ground, but it quickly swelled into a deafening, otherworldly roar, as if echoing from beyond the heavens. Sinister. Unnerving. Soul-shaking.
And then—
A colossal shadow descended.
"Lowly creature… how much of your lifespan do you offer?"
The same words. The same script.
The yellow weasel was petrified, its body collapsing into a trembling heap, too terrified to even raise its head beneath the overwhelming pressure of the demon’s aura.
The Lifespan Heavenly Demon observed the weasel’s pitiful state with satisfaction. This was how things were supposed to go. This was how mortal beings ought to react in its presence—unlike that damned human!
"How much of your lifespan do you offer?" it repeated, patience thinning.
The weasel kowtowed frantically. "O Supreme Heavenly Demon! This lowly one does not offer its own lifespan! It offers… my master’s entire lifespan!"
"Oh?" The demon’s interest was piqued. It had been a while since it last witnessed such blatant betrayal.
"Where is this master of yours?"
"Son! Daddy’s right here!"
Gu Qingfeng’s excited shout rang out as he burst from the dimensional void.
"Surprise! Missed me?"
The Heavenly Demon’s expression twisted in horror.
"YOU AGAIN?! ENOUGH! YOU PATHETIC HUMAN! WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU, I’LL—"
"Eternally torment me, right? Could you at least come up with a new line?" Gu Qingfeng cut in.
The weasel stared, utterly baffled by the exchange. What the hell happened between these two to make a Heavenly Demon lose its composure like this?
But it didn’t have time to dwell on it. This was its chance—its ticket to freedom, to escape this miserable life of hauling bricks at the construction site.
"Heavenly Demon, great one! This humble spirit offers his entire lifespan!" the weasel blurted, then nervously glanced at Gu Qingfeng, fearing instant retaliation.
Instead, it was met with an approving nod.
"You insects dare conspire against me?!" the demon roared. "Just wait until my true form arrives! I’ll drag both of you to the Heavenly Demon Realm and—"
"Eternally torment us?"
"ARGH! YOU’RE DEAD! YOU’RE SO DEAD!"
The Heavenly Demon’s furious screams shook the air as the weasel cowered in confusion.
Why?! Why am I the one getting cursed when I’m sacrificing someone else’s lifespan?!
"Alright, son, enough yapping. Let’s get this over with."
Gu Qingfeng waved dismissively, utterly unconcerned. The contract was already sealed—there was no backing out now.
Ever since his first encounter with the Oath Demon, Gu Qingfeng had noticed something peculiar. Despite their immense power, with tendrils stretching across countless worlds and the ability to project their avatars anywhere, these demons adhered to a mysterious set of rules rather than acting without restraint.
Fulfilling contracts was one such rule, which was why Gu Qingfeng wasn’t worried about the Longevity Demon reneging on its deal.
Fuming, the Longevity Demon donned a mask of agony and fell silent, proceeding with the ritual without another word.
Mostly because it couldn’t win the argument.
In the Demon Realm, disputes were always settled by force—who had time for verbal sparring?
Whoosh!
A massive, milky-white orb descended from the heavens. (290 years.)
Gu Qingfeng happily caught the orb and waited patiently for the scythe.
The next moment, the blade flashed.
A gentle breeze brushed past, leaving Gu Qingfeng invigorated.
Ding!
Host has been attacked by the Longevity Demon.
Lifespan +2,900 years!
"Dammit, so stingy! Put some more effort into it!" Gu Qingfeng cursed. But before he could continue his tirade, the Longevity Demon vanished, having completed the ritual.
"Ah, greed is a sin. One must learn contentment." Gu Qingfeng sighed. "This round, my lifespan has reached 5,800 years, and I’ve gained an extra 440 years of unclaimed lifespan. Not a bad haul."
With that, he walked over and patted the weasel on the head.
"Good job. I’m pleased. As a reward, I’ll extend your deadline by another day. Finish building my villa within two days, and you’ll avoid punishment."
The weasel was on the verge of tears. A three-story, 1,500-square-meter lakeside villa with a swimming pool, wraparound balcony, and a backyard garden? Even three days wouldn’t be enough! And yet, in desperation, it had claimed it could be done in one.
Now, not only had its deadline been cut short, but it had also earned the attention of a demon. Talk about rotten luck.
"Th-thank you for your mercy, Master," the weasel forced a smile.
Gu Qingfeng withdrew his hand from its head. "Go on, back to work."
"Yes..." The weasel smoothed its ruffled fur with a look of utter despair before vanishing into the dimensional rift.
Once the weasel was gone, Gu Qingfeng stored away the Demon Scroll, deciding to take a break before summoning another demon.
Demons weren’t fools. Right now, they’d be on high alert, refusing any contracts tied to this world. Best to wait—there was no rush.
Besides, that weasel had likely been blacklisted, just like him. He’d need to find another lackey next time.
With that settled, Gu Qingfeng rummaged through his spatial ring and picked out a random pill, preparing to infuse it with ten years of unclaimed lifespan to complete the Ageless Pill.
Time to claim his title as the Emperor’s Equal!
But just as he was about to begin, he paused.
"No way. Ten years is too generous for that old emperor. Better string him along, squeeze every last drop from him."
With that, he infused the pill with just one year of unclaimed lifespan.
And so, the Ageless Pill was complete.
【Prologue: The Beginning of It All – Use holy water to heal the saintess tainted by demonic energy, then converse with her.】 Shen Nian stared at his older sister sipping yogurt, lost in thought. So you’re telling me my sister is the saintess, and yogurt is the holy water? 【Main Quest 1: Brave Youth, Become an Adventurer! Reward: Rookie Adventurer Title.】 【Side Quest 1: Find the Adorable Kitty! Reward: 1000 Gold Coins.】 Shen Nian: "Wait, I’m a high school senior here—did some guy who got isekai’d accidentally bind his system to me?" Hold on, completing quests gives gold rewards? Titles even boost stats? Is this for real? (A lighthearted, absurd campus comedy—not a revenge power fantasy.)
transmigrates into the world as the sect master of the Heavenly Yan Sect, which is on the verge of being wiped out. He binds a system that grants him cultivation power based on the number of disciples he has: for each disciple, he automatically gains a year's worth of cultivation every single day! Take one disciple: every day he gains 1 year of cultivation power. While others struggle through a year of bitter training, he gets the same just by sleeping through a single night. Take ten disciples: every day he gains 10 years of cultivation power. Foundation Establishment, Core Formation, Nascent Soul—he breezes through all bottlenecks without lifting a finger. Take one hundred disciples: every day he gains 100 years of cultivation power. Even a Soul Transformation Venerable before him can’t survive a single blow. Take ten thousand disciples: every day he gains 10,000 years of cultivation power! With a wave of his hand, he topples empires. With a single step, he crushes the sacred grounds of the universe. ... While others fight tooth and nail for secret techniques, Lin Yan casually hands out Nascent Soul-level cultivation manuals as beginner textbooks. While others strain to find talented recruits, Lin Yan opens his doors to anyone—so long as they’re human. In just three short years, the Heavenly Yan Sect went from a backwater sect made up of three crumbling huts to a sacred land that every cultivator under heaven would kill to enter. ... One day, otherworldly demon gods invade, with a million demon soldiers pressing down upon the realm. Lin Yan, yawning, rises from his lounge chair and glances at the system panel: [Current Disciples: 1.28 million] [Daily Cultivation Increase: 1.28 million years] He waves his hand casually, and the countless demon soldiers are reduced to ashes in an instant. “So noisy… interrupting my fishing.”
e bizarre and supernatural had descended. The previous emperor was a thoroughgoing tyrant; no longer satisfied with human women, he had set his sights on a stunningly beautiful supernatural entity. He met his end in his bedchamber, drained of all his vital essence. As the legitimate eldest son and crown prince, Wang Hao was thus hastily enthroned, becoming the young emperor of the Great Zhou Dynasty. No sooner had he awakened the "Imperial Sign-In Intelligence System" than he was assassinated by a Son of Destiny—a classic villain's opening. The Great Zhou, ravaged by the former emperor's excesses, was in national decline. The great families within its borders harbored their own treacherous schemes, martial sects began to defy the imperial court's decrees, and border armies, their pay and provisions in arrears, grumbled incessantly against the central government. Fortunately, the central capital was still held secure by the half-million Imperial Guards and fifty thousand Imperial Forest Army who obeyed the court's orders, along with the royal family's hidden reserves of power, barely managing to suppress the realm. As the Great Zhou's finances worsened and supernatural activities grew ever more frequent, the court sat atop a volcano. Ambitious plotters everywhere dreamed of overthrowing the dynasty, and even some reclusive ancient powers emerged, attempting to sway the tides of the world. At the first grand court assembly, the civil and military officials nearly came to blows, fighting tooth and nail over the allocation of fifty million taels of silver from the summer tax revenues. The spectacle opened Wang Hao's eyes—the Great Zhou's bureaucracy was not only corrupt but also martially proficient, a cabinet of all-rounders. Some officials even had the audacity to suggest the emperor release funds from the imperial privy purse to address the emergency. Wang Hao suddenly felt weary. Let it all burn.
e school belle recognized by the whole school, a genius girl from the kendo club. She also has a hidden identity, the youngest legendary demon hunter. Chen Shuo just transmigrated and found himself turned into a weak, helpless little vampire. He was caught by Su Xiyen and taken home at the very beginning. Since then, Chen Shuo's life creed only had two items. "First, classmate Su Xiyen is always right." "Second, if classmate Su Xiyen is wrong, please refer back to item one." Many years later, Chen Shuo, who had turned back into a human, led a pair of twins to appear in front of all the vampires to share the secret of how he turned back into a human. "It's simple, I tricked a female demon hunter into becoming my wife!"
