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The Villain: My System Is Not So Serious

The Villain: My System Is Not So Serious Chapter 497

For some reason, ever since learning about Shen Yu's pregnancy, Yu Wan'er had been feeling inexplicably irritated whenever she saw Jiang Che.

In the end, she could only blame everything on Jiang Che.

This definitely wasn’t jealousy—she was just standing up for Sister Shen Yu!

Yes, that was it. She was defending Shen Yu’s honor! Jiang Che was such a scumbag... she absolutely had to teach him a lesson on Shen Yu’s behalf.

"You little brat, just wait till I knock you up—then you’ll behave!"

Jiang Che pinched Yu Wan'er’s delicate cheek hard with his large hand, leaving the girl’s face red and swollen.

In the past, that kind of force would’ve torn a chunk of flesh right off Yu Wan'er’s face. But now, this little gremlin was no longer the same—she had become incredibly tough.

"Go ahead and knock me up! You think I can’t handle giving birth?"

Yu Wan'er puffed up her cheeks, glaring defiantly at Jiang Che.

She even deliberately stuck out her tiny belly, though her waist was thinner than Jiang Che’s thigh. Just imagining the scenario filled one with guilt.

But then she panicked—why on earth had she said something like that?

"Tsk tsk tsk, so you actually want to have a baby?" Jiang Che teased.

This little tsundere was so easy to mess with.

......

To be honest, Jiang Che had been quite stressed lately. After the spiritual energy resurgence and the reforms of several major corporations, the workload had piled up like crazy.

Though Leng Ningqiu and the others handled most of the tasks, there were still countless issues to resolve.

Inside the CEO’s office of Yuanche Pharmaceutical...

"Master, the first batch of spirit herbs has been successfully cultivated. Several thousand acres of low-grade spirit fields have yielded a total of 8,000 tons of various medicinal herbs, enough to refine eight batches of low-grade pills. For the first batch, we’ve selected: Qi Condensation Pills, Spirit Gathering Pills, Blood Vitality Pills, Plumpness Pills, Indestructible Vigor Pills, and Kidney Nourishing Pills..."

Jiang Che coughed awkwardly—why did these pills sound increasingly ridiculous?

"This... what’s the deal with—"

Leng Ningqiu, holding the report, nestled into Jiang Che’s arms and giggled behind her hand. "Market research shows these are the most in-demand pills right now..."

"Oh... I see! I see!" Jiang Che forced a laugh.

Young and robust, with his Heaven-Shattering cultivation and the super-regenerative factor from his Deadpool-like abilities, he couldn’t relate to the struggles of middle-aged men clutching their goji berry-infused thermoses.

"Fine, go ahead and refine them. But restrict distribution to members of the Cultivators’ Association only..."

Leng Ningqiu rolled her eyes at him.

"Master~~~ The Cultivators’ Association already has 540 million applicants..."

Jiang Che’s eyes nearly popped out of his skull.

"Holy crap, that many?! We can’t let them all in!" He was stunned. Joining the association came with free pill benefits...

He knew his fellow countrymen loved freebies, but this was insane!

"Of course not. Your grandfather has strict screening criteria—character, background, and cultivation aptitude are all thoroughly vetted. Only about 20,000 have been approved so far."

That was more reasonable. At least Old Man Jiang wasn’t a complete fool.

Only he could freeload off others—no one freeloaded off him!

"By the way, Master, to boost public enthusiasm for cultivation and pill purchases, we might need a spokesperson..."

Leng Ningqiu’s gaze lingered on Jiang Che.

Jiang Che raised a brow. "You want me to be the face of this?"

The woman smiled brightly. "I know you dislike the spotlight, so I’ve already contacted your cousin, Jiang Ruoxu. He said he’d be delighted to help..."

"Hah, you really do understand me."

Jiang Che wrapped an arm around Leng Ningqiu’s slender waist.

"Ah~ I understand you, Master... but do you understand me?" she sighed dramatically.

"Who says I don’t?" Jiang Che grinned.

"Then guess what I’m thinking right now?" Leng Ningqiu’s eyes shimmered like autumn water as she set down the report, her breath warm and sweet.

"Tsk tsk tsk..." Jiang Che didn’t answer. Instead, he flicked his hand—and the floor-to-ceiling curtains snapped shut.

......

Jiang Ruoxu was live again.

In the world of cultivation, he was now a household name. Nearly 99% of the nation was practicing the "Human Emperor Scripture," even kids in remote mountain villages.

"Host, what’s today’s lesson? We’re waiting to learn some spells!"

"You look exhausted, bro. You’ve been working too hard planning cultivation courses for us—take care of yourself!"

Jiang Ruoxu did look haggard.

His master had been whisked away, and now even flexing felt hollow.

[Ding! Congratulations, Host, for pulling off a sick flex. Reward: 10,000 Flex Points.]

Jiang Ruoxu jolted—hell yeah, the grind never stops!

"Today, we’re not cultivating. I’ve got something special for you all!" He flashed a mysterious smile before pulling out several jade bottles.

"You’ve all heard of Yuanche Pharmaceuticals, right? Well, these are their upcoming products—Blood Vitality Pills, Qi Condensation Pills, and... Plumpness Pills..."

His voice trailed off. Why did these names sound so sketchy?

He was just the promoter—he hadn’t even checked what they were beforehand.

Damn it, he’d been set up!

As the face of the "Human Emperor Scripture," with his youthful charm and boy-next-door appeal, Jiang Ruoxu had a massive following of older sisters and "mommy fans."

The moment "Plumpness Pills" left his lips, the chat exploded.

"Plumpness Pills? Are they for what I think they’re for?"

"Little Ruoxu, this big sis can fly over anytime~ Just hook me up with one pill!"

"Sweetie, Auntie doesn’t need Plumpness Pills—my figure’s already perfect. Wanna test it out?"

The comments grew increasingly unhinged, some crossing every line imaginable.

The poor guy had never faced such bold advances—his face burned crimson.

This damn livestream was over!

[Ding! Host has flexed his shyness. Reward: 5,000 Flex Points.]

Cough. Maybe he could tough it out.

Screw it, he’d power through!

With gritted teeth, he explained every pill’s effects—including Indestructible Vigor Pills and Kidney Nourishing Pills.

His cool, aloof persona? Obliterated.

"It’s gotta be Jiang Che’s doing! First, he steals my master, and now he’s setting me up?!"

The kid clenched his fists in frustration.

The chat was flooded with demands for purchase links—some even begged him to take an Indestructible Vigor Pill live.

Though humiliated, his promo was a smashing success.

While the spiritual energy resurgence swept the globe, Jiang Che’s machinations ensured China remained stable.

By controlling resources, he held the nation’s cultivators in his grasp.

Want power? Join the Cultivators’ Association and get the good stuff.

Currently, most cultivators in Dragon Country are at the Qi Refining stage. Those who manage to join the Cultivators' Association are considered so-called "geniuses," and from among these geniuses, the even more exceptional are selected to enter the Immortal Academy.

By widening the gap between the elite and the rest, even if ordinary people manage to learn some mystical arts or spells, they can never truly dominate. In fact, they might just end up being ganged up on and crushed like a common boss in a raid.