Without Me

You Man quickly lowered her eyes, pretending nothing had happened as she crouched to pick up the remote control's batteries, her hands still trembling.

She had known this day would come eventually, but when it finally arrived, she still lost control.

Tears welled up as she tried to reassemble the remote, but her fingers fumbled helplessly.

Her panic was laid bare before Zhou Yi.

Silently, Zhou Yi knelt beside her and took the remote and batteries from her hands.

"Let me do it, Man-jie. Don’t you have anything to ask me?"

You Man forced a strained smile. "No, it’s just... I was so happy you came back suddenly that I dropped the remote."

She was avoiding the topic, preferring to play the fool rather than face the truth.

As Zhou Yi reassembled the remote, he asked, "When did you get here?"

You Man clutched the hem of her clothes, her voice soft. "This morning. I thought I’d buy some furniture to fill your place—it looked too empty."

"Did you have breakfast?"

"Yes."

"Weren’t you curious where I was when you saw I wasn’t home?"

Zhou Yi finished fixing the remote and helped You Man to her feet. They stood on the balcony, bathed in sunlight, the flowers on the windowsill blooming beautifully. Yet You Man’s heart felt icy.

Whatever Zhou Yi had been doing, it wasn’t her business. She had no right to ask—they weren’t in a relationship.

Her lashes fluttered, tears pooling in her lovely eyes.

She bit her lip, refusing to let them fall, and forced another smile.

"You’re always busy with work. I figured you were handling something important, so I didn’t want to disturb you."

Zhou Yi looked down at her, his tone indifferent. "Then can you guess what I was doing now?"

You Man fell silent.

"I thought you’d be angry. Turns out, I’m not that important to you after all."

At those words, You Man’s head snapped up. Panicked, she stammered, "No, that’s not—I just... I don’t have the right to question you."

"I’d rather see you angry—even hit me—than pretend nothing happened."

Zhou Yi looked desolate, leaning against the balcony railing, lost in thought.

A tear finally slipped down You Man’s cheek. She grabbed his hand, desperate to explain.

Earlier, she had been heartbroken over the traces of another woman on Zhou Yi’s lips. But now, seeing him like this, she felt guilty for hurting him with her reaction.

Between sobs, she whispered, "I—I was afraid to ask. What if you told me you had a girlfriend? What identity, what right would I have to stay by your side? So I pretended not to know. At least this way, we can still act like friends."

Zhou Yi shrugged off his jacket and tossed it aside. Gently, he wiped her tears. "I don’t have a girlfriend."

You Man sniffled. "Really? Don’t lie to me."

His expression twisted with conflict. "Really. But I have to be honest—last night... I slept with someone else."

Her fingers curled inward, her lips trembling. The pain was unbearable, like needles stabbing her heart.

Yet she knew—she had no claim over him.

Zhou Yi had never been hers.

Full of remorse, he said, "Man-jie, I didn’t want to deceive you, but I couldn’t bear to see you hurt. The moment I saw you like this, I regretted it. If you’re angry, hit me."

He could have spun a thousand lies to placate her, but he chose the truth.

Because this day was inevitable. Zhou Yi was a playboy—his heart would never settle for one woman.

You Man had known from the start they would never have a future. She never imagined someone like her could be Zhou Yi’s one and only. All she could do was learn to accept it.

With a sigh, she thought: At least he didn’t lie. No empty promises, no sweet talk.

He owned his actions, confessed his regret.

Shaking her head, she said, "Xiao Yi, I’ve told you before—we’re not in a relationship. You don’t have to worry about my feelings."

Zhou Yi carefully pulled her into his arms, like a child seeking forgiveness.

"Man-jie, you’re the most important person to me. Of course I care how you feel. No matter what, you’ll always come first. If there’s anything you want to know, I’ll always tell you the truth."

Her heart eased a little. They weren’t lovers, yet he still cherished her enough to explain. For a moment, she almost felt like his girlfriend.

Patting his back, she murmured, "As long as you don’t lie to me, it’s okay. Don’t be upset. Knowing you care is enough to make me happy."

Zhou Yi held her tighter, silent, as if begging for forgiveness. His remorse was so earnest it made her want to laugh, dispelling her earlier sorrow.

"Come on, I’m fine now. Why are you the one moping?"

"I feel terrible. Maybe you’d have been happier if we’d never met."

"Never." You Man met his gaze firmly. "I’ve never regretted knowing you."

Without him, she’d still be drifting through life, numb and unfulfilled.

Her past had been bleak—widowed young, running a small shop, each day a colorless repeat of the last. What difference was there between living a lifetime and living a single day like that?

No love, no hate, no purpose, no one who cared. That kind of existence had no future, but she’d had no choice—until Zhou Yi.

Loving him gave her hope. Someone finally cared for her, and she had someone to care for in return. She poured everything into him willingly, finding joy in it.

She never demanded his love in return.

Waiting for him brought her happiness. Seeing him brought even more. The moment she started dressing up for him, she truly came alive.

She learned to style herself, to take pride in her reflection. His compliments made her blush with delight.

She mastered baking, studied restaurant management, even considered further education.

She was moving forward—striving to become someone worthy of Zhou Yi.

So was his presence meaningless?

Would her life have been happier without him?

For You Man, the answer was clear.

Zhou Yi would never understand. She needed this love, this anchor to keep living—even if they could never be together forever.

Not to mention he also provided her with a life of material comfort, sparing her from hardship.

To put it bluntly, she even felt unworthy to be Zhou Yi’s lover.

"Zhou Yi, for me, your presence alone has brought light to my otherwise dull life. Even if that light doesn’t belong to me, it still illuminated my path. Do you understand?"

That wasn’t my moon, but for a moment, its light did fall upon me.

That was the meaning of Zhou Yi’s arrival.

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