The Big Misunderstanding

Ning Shu was startled, her heart thumping: "What's going on here...?"

She remembered the last time the two of them went into the woods together, also holding hands, but without this feeling.

"Could it be...I've fallen for this guy?" She thought. "No way..."

Ning Shu followed Lu Zhe, stepping high and low into the woods. She just felt confused!

It was difficult to walk in these woods. To ensure safety, Lu Zhe took careful steps!

He used a stick to beat the grass ahead, scaring away resting poisonous bugs and snakes!

And walking through the woods, Lu Zhe also discovered good stuff!

He found a shrub with small red berries growing on it. Holding it in his hand, information appeared in his mind!

Raspberries!

Lu Zhe was overjoyed!

These were sweet and sour berries. Though the texture was nothing special, they quenched thirst, cleared heat and detoxified!

They were very good wild fruits!

He and Ning Shu picked a small bagful, and each ate quite a few!

After walking for a while longer, trouble came! Ning Shu suddenly grabbed her stomach, feeling the urge to use the bathroom!

"Crap, why now..."

"What's wrong?"

"I..." Ning Shu smiled awkwardly. "I need to pee a little!"

Lu Zhe looked around and nodded. "Go here. I'll turn around!"

"No, that won't work!"

"Why wouldn't it work?"

Ning Shu's face flushed, extremely conflicted. "It's...a number two."

"Number two?" Lu Zhe said in pleasant surprise. "Wow, is the legendary melon seed finally going to come out into the world?"

Ning Shu punched Lu Zhe. "Don't mention seeds. Wait here, I'll go find a place myself!"

She looked around to find somewhere private!

Lu Zhe found a protruding rock. After checking for traces of poisonous snakes or bugs, he said: "This spot is great!"

Ning Shu looked and pushed Lu Zhe. "Fine! Go, get away from me. I'll deal with the seeds myself later!"

"Okay okay, I'm leaving!"

"Hey, don't go too far!"

"I'll stay in sight. Call if you need anything!"

"Don't turn around!"

"Why would I be so bored?"

Lu Zhe observed nearby plants for edible wild vegetables and herbs!

Before long, Ning Shu let out a breath.

"Done!"

When she went to pull up her pants, she discovered a terrible problem!

Crap!

No toilet paper!

Oh right, Lu Zhe had a notebook!

Tearing off two pages would have to do!

"Lu Zhe!"

"Yes?"

"Tear off two clean pages from my notebook..."

She thought this was a perfectly reasonable demand. But unexpectedly, Lu Zhe flat out rejected it:

"No way!"

Lu Zhe explained: "Now every page in the notebooks are extremely precious non-renewable resources for recording important information. How could they be used to wipe your butt!?"

Ning Shu pleadingly: "Then what do I do..."

Lu Zhe's solution was simple and crude: "Simple! Don't wipe, just pull up your pants! Wash off at the beach later!"

Ning Shu was annoyed: "Lu Zhe, you're clearly trying to make me look bad!"

Lu Zhe calmly and nonchalantly replied: "No, I'm suggesting the safest, most reasonable, most scientific method!"

"Fine! You're going too far!" Ning Shu nodded. "I'll figure something out myself!"

Suddenly, Lu Zhe thought of something and warned: "Class monitor, I advise you not to think of anything, especially not to use leaves. Immediately pull up your pants and come out!"

"Thanks but no thanks for your concern!"

Ning Shu emerged, holding a tightly tied little plastic bag!

"Done!"

Lu Zhe grabbed her wrist. "Did you wipe?"

Ning Shu raised her eyebrows. "None of your business!"

As Ning Shu walked further in, she felt an unbearable itchiness in her inner thighs!

"Ow..."

She wanted to scratch but was worried it would ruin her image as a young lady!

Enduring it was also extremely uncomfortable!

Just then, Lu Zhe realized: "You used leaves, right?"

Ning Shu said: "I'm a girl, it's not like I could just air dry! I just casually..."

Lu Zhe sternly said: "Air drying for a while is better than getting hurt! Do you know, in the past when the army was in Southeast Asia, soldiers used leaves from unknown sources to wipe their butts. Guess what happened?"

Ning Shu blankly asked: "What happened?"

Lu Zhe made a gun gesture to his temple and said:

"Boom! They committed suicide!"

"Very funny! I thought they were poisoned to death! I've heard similar jokes before. A dog died after eating mushrooms, then its owner started vomiting violently. Turns out the dog was hit by a car instead!"

Lu Zhe solemnly said: "But do you know why they committed suicide?"

His grim tone made Ning Shu a little nervous.

She stammered: "W-why?"

"The unbearable itching was worse than death!"

"Huh?" Ning Shu shivered, and the current discomfort below made her break out in a cold sweat!

"Which leaf did you use?"

"It was..." Wherever Ning Shu tried to go, it felt like a hundred bugs crawling over her skin. No matter how much she stomped her feet, it didn't alleviate the feeling!

Lu Zhe helplessly walked over and picked up the poop-stained leaf!

Information about the leaf appeared in his mind!

"Dogbane, also called stinging nettle or scorpion grass! It has fine hairs that painfully sting like bees. The itching is unbearable!

The purple variety has medicinal value! It tastes pungent, bitter and cold. Highly toxic. Mainly treats unceasing vomiting. For snake bites, grind and apply topically. For early symptoms of measles, dot treated areas and the rash will be gone overnight!"

It seemed the purple leaves could detoxify, but this plant was green without much medicinal value!

The key problem was, even slight contact with the back of the hand would cause endless pain. Using it to wipe sensitive areas was unimaginably agonizing!

Ning Shu yelled: "Hurry throw it away! Too disgusting!"

It was clear Ning Shu had reached her limit of discomfort!

Luckily it wouldn't endanger her life!

So how to detoxify?

Lu Zhe checked the system manual. Three methods were given!

1. Thoroughly wash with soap and water!

No way to do that here!

2. Detoxify with herbal medicine (wormwood, honeysuckle, snake tongue grass, wild mint etc.). Grind and apply on affected area!

Also couldn't find so many herbs right now!

3. Emergency wilderness treatment method!

Quickly wash affected area with sterile water!

Where to find sterile water?

Wait!

Lu Zhe seemed to have thought of something!

Recommend Series

Transmigrated Into the CEO Brother of the Real and Fake Heiresses

Transmigrated Into the CEO Brother of the Real and Fake Heiresses

u Chenyuan transmigrated into a female-oriented novel about a real and fake heiress, becoming the CEO elder brother of both. Unfortunately, the entire Lu family—including himself, the CEO—were mere cannon fodder in the story. Determined to save himself, Lu Chenyuan took action. The spoiled, attention-seeking fake heiress? Thrown into the harsh realities of the working class to learn humility. The love-struck real heiress? Pushed toward academic excellence, so lofty goals would blind her to trivial romances. As for the betrayed, vengeful arranged marriage wife… the plot hadn’t even begun yet. There was still time—if he couldn’t handle her, he could at least avoid her. "CEO Lu, are you avoiding me?" Mo Qingli fixed her gaze on Lu Chenyuan. For the first time, the shrewd and calculating Lu Chenyuan felt a flicker of unease.

Poor Talent? I Bought a Year of Cultivation for One Dollar!

Poor Talent? I Bought a Year of Cultivation for One Dollar!

ut it can buy an entire year of absolutely perfect training results! Su Yu stared at his empty wallet and decisively opened up various online loan platforms. “Borrow a thousand bucks! Recharge my vitality!” Boom! His vitality broke a hundred points, shattering the limits of the human body! “Borrow ten thousand bucks! Recharge my combat skills!” Boom! A basic punching technique so common it was everywhere instantly maxed out, revealing the ultimate assassination technique of Five Elements Unity—Inner Force! When a rich kid hired assassins for a midnight ambush, aiming to break both of his legs, they instead ran headfirst into a monster—a human-shaped tyrannosaur, brimming with dragon-like vitality. With just two fingers, Su Yu snapped a steel staff reinforced with alloy. Staring at the killer’s stash of stolen cash—a staggering quarter-million dollars—he showed a corporate-sincere smile: “Thanks for the pre-exam gift pack, Mr. Zhao! I’m gonna go re-invest this!” Three days later, at the National Martial Arts College Entrance Exam, while everyone else struggled just to reach the passing line, Su Yu threw a single punch—and more than a thousand vitality points literally detonated the entire arena!

Just Became Emperor, Already Assassinated by the Son of Destiny

Just Became Emperor, Already Assassinated by the Son of Destiny

e bizarre and supernatural had descended. The previous emperor was a thoroughgoing tyrant; no longer satisfied with human women, he had set his sights on a stunningly beautiful supernatural entity. He met his end in his bedchamber, drained of all his vital essence. As the legitimate eldest son and crown prince, Wang Hao was thus hastily enthroned, becoming the young emperor of the Great Zhou Dynasty. No sooner had he awakened the "Imperial Sign-In Intelligence System" than he was assassinated by a Son of Destiny—a classic villain's opening. The Great Zhou, ravaged by the former emperor's excesses, was in national decline. The great families within its borders harbored their own treacherous schemes, martial sects began to defy the imperial court's decrees, and border armies, their pay and provisions in arrears, grumbled incessantly against the central government. Fortunately, the central capital was still held secure by the half-million Imperial Guards and fifty thousand Imperial Forest Army who obeyed the court's orders, along with the royal family's hidden reserves of power, barely managing to suppress the realm. As the Great Zhou's finances worsened and supernatural activities grew ever more frequent, the court sat atop a volcano. Ambitious plotters everywhere dreamed of overthrowing the dynasty, and even some reclusive ancient powers emerged, attempting to sway the tides of the world. At the first grand court assembly, the civil and military officials nearly came to blows, fighting tooth and nail over the allocation of fifty million taels of silver from the summer tax revenues. The spectacle opened Wang Hao's eyes—the Great Zhou's bureaucracy was not only corrupt but also martially proficient, a cabinet of all-rounders. Some officials even had the audacity to suggest the emperor release funds from the imperial privy purse to address the emergency. Wang Hao suddenly felt weary. Let it all burn.

After Rebirth, I Gained an Extra Sister

After Rebirth, I Gained an Extra Sister

lanned to earn money steadily and take life at a slower pace. But he never expected... his father's remarriage, and the stepmother bringing along a dependent, would completely disrupt his life's plans...