I'm Big, You're Pig

"I said, if you like it, I'll buy it for you first. Are you deaf?"

Shen Nian poked Xia Yanchun hard on the forehead.

Xia Yanchun was stunned. She froze for a moment before replying, "Buy it for me? I thought you were buying it for your mom?"

"I'm not taking it back home until winter break anyway. My parents aren't in a rush. If you like it, I'll just buy it for you first."

"You're just spouting whatever comes into your head, aren't you..."

Out of nowhere, he wanted to buy someone a necklace. One second he was planning to buy it for his mother, and the next he wanted to buy it for her. Did this big idiot Shen Nian ever think before speaking?

Was a luxury item like a necklace something you just casually bought because someone liked it?

She felt like Shen Nian was the type of guy who, on the first day of a relationship, would get scammed into buying an iPhone, then a Mac on the second day, and a watch on the third, all while grinning like a fool.

"What's wrong? I offer to buy it for you and you're not happy?" If there weren't strangers around, Shen Nian probably would have picked his nose right in front of her.

"Idiot, I don't need this. Do you even have that much money? You have to borrow money from me just to afford it. If you buy this, what about your mom's gift?"

"If I run out of money, I'll just go fishing for a few more days. You know I'm really good at fishing."

"Sigh... I'm speechless." Xia Yanchun sighed. She stared at Shen Nian for a while and realized he wasn't joking or trying to trick her at all.

That made her even more annoyed.

She didn't need a necklace. It wasn't that she didn't like it, but it felt weird having Shen Nian borrow money from her to buy something for her. If she really needed one, she would definitely pay for it herself.

If Shen Nian borrowed money to buy her a gift—leaving aside whether he paid it back—she would feel obligated to buy him something decent in return just to get over the mental hurdle. She really didn't want Shen Nian spending that much money.

"I appreciate the thought, but don't buy the gift." Xia Yanchun crossed her arms. A little brother was a little brother, after all. Even at eighteen, he wasn't mature at all.

Although the idea of lending Shen Nian money to buy her a necklace—and getting him to call her 'Big Sister' to waive the interest—was very tempting... Shen Nian didn't know better, so she had to be the sensible one!

Shen Nian twitched his lips. "Tch, fine. If you don't want it, forget it."

I'll just buy you a better one separately later, he thought.

Xia Yanchun nodded. "That's more like it. So, how much do you need to borrow? You should probably borrow a bit more, otherwise you'll be broke after buying this."

"Alright, then I'll spend your money."

The sales associate had been feeling uneasy listening to them. She thought they weren't going to buy it after all.

Most of her customers were men in their thirties or fifties; that age group was usually the most generous. It was rare to see two people this young buying jewelry.

A guy borrowing his girlfriend's money to buy a necklace for his mom... not only was it rare, but it was also pretty bizarre.

If the girl was ugly, and the guy was living off his looks, that would be one thing. But why was the girl so pretty too? Her skin was to die for, completely flawless without a trace of makeup!

The sales associate felt a quiet twinge of envy.

"Lend me two thousand for now. I'll pay you back slowly when I have money."

"Hmph. I feel like you're going to be shameless and drag out the repayment." Xia Yanchun grumbled as she transferred the money on her phone.

"Impossible. I'm not interested in money."

"Poser. You didn't even want to pay me back the change from the convenience store earlier."

"I was just teasing you."

"A poser is a poser, trying to find an excuse for himself."

Shen Nian was speechless. Haji-Chun really wasn't giving him any face.

Couldn't she see all these people around? What was wrong with letting a bro show off a bit? It was a waste of affection. Shen Nian decided he would only pay back one thousand and keep the other thousand to act like a boss.

The debtor is the real boss, after all.

Chun-bao, you wouldn't want me to owe you money and not pay it back, right?

Since it was a big brand, Shen Nian bought it directly.

The sales associate carefully took the necklace out of the counter and placed it gently on a soft pad. "Would you like to try it on?"

"Let's try it," Xia Yanchun said.

His mom wasn't here, so she had to be the mannequin!

Afraid of dropping it due to clumsiness, Xia Yanchun let the sales associate put it around her neck. There was a huge floor-to-ceiling mirror in the store. Xia Yanchun pulled down her collar slightly to reveal the necklace against her collarbone.

Hmm... it looked really good.

Xia Yanchun felt beautiful.

Shen Nian stood next to her, peering into the mirror. He rubbed his chin and exclaimed in mock surprise, "It actually matches you pretty well. Is this the legendary phenomenon where if the person is good-looking, they look good in anything?"

Complimenting the necklace while simultaneously complimenting the person—Shen Nian was quite shrewd in this regard.

Xia Yanchun clearly enjoyed it. She tilted her pale neck up slightly like a kitten, looking more satisfied the longer she looked.

"Then let's go with this one!"

"Hmm, let me try it too." Shen Nian grinned.

The sales associate put it on Shen Nian as well. He looked at himself with satisfaction. "The saying 'a handsome guy looks good in anything' has just been personified in this moment."

"...Narcissist."

"You just complained but didn't refute it? Looks like it's a fact."

Shen Nian asked the sales associate to unclasped it and finalized the purchase.

However, he didn't buy the one they had tried on, but a brand new, unopened one from the stockroom. It was the same logic as buying a phone; no one wanted to buy the display unit from the counter.

There were also authenticity certificates and such. Shen Nian never understood what these things actually proved. If black-hearted manufacturers were going to fake gold and silver, why wouldn't they fake a certificate too?

It only had credibility if you took it to an institution for appraisal yourself.

But with a big chain brand, there wasn't much risk of getting scammed.

"Sir, Miss, please take care."

Xia Yanchun snatched it first, holding it like a treasure in her arms, terrified of dropping it. She even wound the packaging ribbon around her fingers twice.

The packaging was super high-end, consisting of several layers. Inside was an exquisite gift bag with the brand logo, outside was a plain gift bag to avoid drawing attention, and inside that was a small box. Only after opening that did you get to the red box containing the necklace. It was like a Russian nesting doll.

For such a tiny necklace, the packaging weighed a pound.

"Let me hold it for a bit." Shen Nian reached out.

Xia Yanchun handed it to him. "Hold it tight."

"Whoa, is this the weight of money? The unbearable weight of life."

"So much money, spent just like that..."

Shen Nian checked his task progress. Hmm, the hotpot at lunch, paying for their shopping, and now the necklace—combining all the miscellaneous expenses, the progress was nearing six thousand.

He laughed. "Yeah, this stuff really burns money."

"This counts as high luxury, you know."

"It's only high luxury if you buy and replace them often. For people like us who only buy something like this a few times in a lifetime, we buy it to have no regrets."

Xia Yanchun clasped her hands behind her back. For once, she agreed with his logic. She nodded her little head and leaned toward him, pressing against his shoulder.

The mall was still bright at night. This was the peak time for shoppers. Passing by a restaurant, they saw the waiters inside were so busy they could barely keep up.

Xia Yanchun fidgeted with her fingers as she followed Shen Nian home. When they reached the mall exit, she clenched her small fist and lightly punched Shen Nian on the back.

"What for?"

"Were you serious just now when you said you'd buy it for me first?"

"Yeah," Shen Nian answered instantly. "But it's too late to regret it now."

"I'm not the one with regrets. You're the one acting all erratic. Just because I said it looked good, you did a complete 180. You said you were buying that for your mom."

"My mom won't get hers until winter break anyway. But if I buy it for you, you can wear it right now."

Xia Yanchun hadn't even formulated a response when Shen Nian immediately followed up with a grin, "Of course, there's a much more basic reason. Do you want to know what it is?"

Xia Yanchun lowered her gaze. Shen Nian was dangling such an obvious cliffhanger; it wasn't exactly hard to guess what he was going to say.

"That you like me?"

"Holy crap, you even knew that? Are you using cheat codes?"

"Hmph. I'm smart, you're a dummy."

"The audacity! You dare roast me? You'd better sleep with one eye open tonight!"

"We're mortal enemies, so we have to be opposites. If I have the audacity, then you have the stupidity. I'm 'Big' Guts, so you're just a 'Pig'."

"..."

Haji Chun had a whole arsenal of sassy comebacks. It was terrifying.