Ye Cheng wins MVP, the head maid is a carried dog

“Exactly the same?”

Tang Yuyao stared at the Head Maid interface on her screen, stunned. It was exactly the same layout as the account of Xia Tongxin she had seen before.

All heroes, all skins, every trailing effect, every kill effect... every single one maxed out.

The name was the same too, except now it carried a label like “Number Two,” which meant there were probably Number Three, Number Four, Number Five... and so on, right?

Where did they find this person?

Tang Yuyao’s face flushed red with anger, her expression furious enough to eat someone alive. She clicked through the interface repeatedly, studying it, and finally reached a conclusion.

Both were female, both extremely wealthy. One of them, this one called Xiaxia, seemed to have a very close relationship with someone—calling each other “Xiaxia” all the time.

Her own treatment was worlds apart. She had never heard Ye Cheng call her anything like “Yaoyao,” such a sweet nickname. “Doctor Tang,” on the other hand...

Tang Yuyao: “...”

That awkward note-writing incident came flooding back. Her face instantly darkened, and she shot a cold, murderous glare toward the other room.

She squinted her eyes but eventually held back her anger, though in her mind she had already started plotting revenge.

Ye Cheng: “Alright, everyone’s here. Let me change the team name.”

“The room owner has changed the team name to ‘Tough-as-Nails Real Men’!”

Tang Yuyao: “...”

Tang Yuyao: “What an ugly name.”

Ye Cheng: “Really? Don’t you think it has a sense of power? It symbolizes that we’re unbeatable, invincible in every fight...”

Tang Yuyao: “...”

Tang Yuyao gave up wasting any more breath arguing with him. She couldn’t win. So she just tapped on Ye Cheng’s avatar to signal him to start the match quickly.

First round begins!

The queue matched them against another five-player team, and the difference between the two sides was stark. The opponents were all decked out in noble skins, starting from Noble Level 5 as a minimum.

Ye Cheng’s team was a bit of a mixed bag: two players with zero spending, three at Noble Level 10, with the little nephew and Ye Cheng being the two broke ones.

In the next room, on the bed.

“Little uncle, we look so plain compared to them, just half-skins... sigh...” The little nephew sighed, his eyes full of longing for those noble skins.

Ye Cheng shook his head: “So what? They still have to wait for us to start the game, don’t they? Besides, if you turn the graphics down to the lowest setting, they’re basically worse-looking than our defaults!”

“Little uncle, is this what they call spiritual victory in the books?” the little nephew asked, sounding a bit naive.

His teacher had mentioned some method like that, something about Ah-Q? He couldn’t remember clearly, but because the name had a Q in it, it made him think of QQ candy, and that stuck in his mind.

“Not quite, not quite—I’m just stating facts. Try it yourself and see?”

The little nephew, half trusting, adjusted his phone’s graphics to the lowest settings: “Wow, you’re right! This actually looks better than theirs!”

“And there are more benefits than that. Look at how flashy their skins are—it’s hard to see clearly in team fights. You can’t even tell who’s rushing in. We don’t have that problem.”

“Little uncle, you’re a genius! But... come to think of it, little uncle, don’t we never fight as a team anyway?”

“Don’t worry about that. You just focus on jungling properly. First rule: don’t start fights.”

With Ye Cheng’s guidance, the little nephew had an epiphany and suddenly understood: “Little uncle, you’re right. A jungler should just jungle. If you do well, the gold medal will come naturally!”

Their little discussion ended, and they returned to the match.

Ye Cheng had latched onto the little nephew’s head, then minimized the window to watch a video, ready to sneak a couple of minions or activate a shield when needed. Unless something unexpected happened, this round was another gold medal.

Another extra little star for him. He was just too good at this!

The others had such an easy time managing the game: just positioning themselves properly, calling out enemy positions, clearing lanes, avoiding ganks, picking fights, capturing enemies... that was about it.

His job was much more complicated—alternating basic attacks, finger on the screen, eyes on the monitor...

Xia Tongxin: “Grandpa Bull, hurry up and help me up here! I can’t fight two people by myself.”

After holding on for nearly five minutes, Xia Tongxin couldn’t take it anymore and sent out a distress signal from the farming lane.

The only reason Xia Tongxin liked playing the farming lane was the money—more gold meant more damage, and then she could just rack up kills. But for some reason, no matter how much damage she did, she never got the MVP.

Obviously, Xia Tongxin’s thinking was all wrong. Out here, you needed real skill, not just fighting alone. What good is high damage?

You had to learn to coast along—the right way. Make the system think you’re mediocre, so it matches you with strong teammates. At the very least, if your teammates are terrible, you can stay safe, earn a gold medal, and even if you lose, you don’t lose points—you gain some!

How absurd is that? Losing and no points deducted—plus points instead!

It’s like some people in real life: they do nothing hard, but they’re loud about how much they suffer and how dedicated they are...

They take the pay but dodge the work.

Of course, this is all about Ye Cheng.

Years of being an orphan of the game had taught Ye Cheng how to be unbeatable: he had mastered the basic logic of life itself. Good people just get taken advantage of!

Ye Cheng: “No can do, Little Blondie. I’m tied up over here too. It’s a one-on-one fight heating up here.”

Ye Cheng and the little nephew’s incredible sup-jungle duo was busy bullying the mother-and-baby boars in the jungle, hitting them back and forth—totally a one-on-one scenario. It drove Xia Tongxin crazy.

After surviving yet another round of the “absolute farming lane” experience (a fair five-versus-one competitive mobile game treatment), she finally died and ended up back in the dark world, watching from above.

Xia Tongxin: “...”

At this point, the view switched to Ye Cheng and the little nephew: one clearing jungle creeps, the other sneaking minions.

Tang Yuyao: “If you eat one more, try it!!!”

Ye Cheng: “...”

Oh boy, she really guards her food. Two little minions—what’s the big deal? They’ll be back in thirty seconds. Don’t be so stingy. Acting this mad will leave you without friends, girl...

Of course, Ye Cheng only dared to mutter these thoughts to himself. If he said them out loud, the next room would immediately hear screams like a pig being slaughtered, along with warm greetings aimed at his family tree.

After the warning, Ye Cheng could only silently move to another spot to spend some small change. Otherwise, as a support, he’d stay too poor.

The gold economy counted heavily toward the score too, even though Ye Cheng couldn’t understand how the developers thought a support needed wealth. Oh well—if you can’t beat them, join them.

You see, the developers make me do this—I have no choice...

Then he happily started eating Xia Tongxin’s minions, since she was dead. It would be a waste not to.

Behind the screen, Xia Tongxin's face was burning red, but she had no idea why. Dying really meant she couldn't farm minions, but... but it was infuriating!

In a daze, Xia Tongxin was thrown back to days earlier, when she and Ye Cheng happened to queue together solo, losing game after game until she finally snapped. Now... here it was again!

After getting her minions stolen, Xia Tongxin respawned with nothing to farm, so she ran to the mid lane and gobbled up Tang Yuyao's minions.

Tang Yuyao: "???"

Tang Yuyao: "Why are you taking my minions?"

Xia Tongxin: "What do you mean 'your minions'? Does it have your name written on it?"

Tang Yuyao: "???"

Oh, my temper!!!

Tang Yuyao's anger flared. She stormed over to the bottom lane to 'share' minions with Xia Tongxin. She even used her ultimate just to last-hit. Xia Tongxin, playing as Little Lobster (a slow hero), arrived to find not a single minion left.

Xia Tongxin: "???"

Xia Tongxin: "What gives you the right to take my minions!"

Tang Yuyao: "What do you mean 'your minions'? Does it have your name written on it?"

Xia Tongxin: "???"

The tables turned, and the boomerang effect hit too fast. She thought she was picking on a pushover, only to realize she was the softest target of all—everyone could have a go at her.

The conflict between them had begun, or rather, it had escalated further. It started the very first time they met. And now, thanks to Ye Cheng's seemingly careless little moves, he managed to stoke the flames of their feud, then vanished into the background. There's a real snake in the grass!

In the room.

"Uncle-in-law, it looks like my aunt is fighting with your friend. What do we do?" The little nephew glanced at the barrage of chat messages in the bottom left corner, sounding uncertain.

"Forget about it. I'm about to hit number one in gold."

As he spoke, Ye Cheng quietly snagged two more minions and a jungle monster—gobbling up minions on his own side and sniping the enemy's, too.

As for why he was "about to" be number one?

Because the number one spot belonged to the Head Maid.

The Head Maid was a true master of time management and gold economy. Solo-laning on the tough lane, she survived ganks from all five enemies, then casually grabbed a jungle monster before retreating. After a few failed attempts to catch her, the enemy team gave up, realizing Ye Cheng's team's weak link was Little Lobster, so they shifted their focus.

With the pressure off, the Head Maid had an even easier time. She just kept farming: clearing waves, taking small jungle camps... Her impeccable macro management and efficiency meant that even Ye Cheng (who was shamelessly hoovering up everything from every lane) couldn't catch up to her gold.

As for the others' gold... well, it was a bit hard to stomach.

The little nephew kept getting leeched by Ye Cheng, placing third in gold. Tang Yuyao was fourth—she had been third earlier, but after clashing with Xia Tongxin for minions and getting caught by the enemy team several times, she fell behind.

The two had become each other's ATMs—if you spotted one, the other was sure to be nearby. Just strike quickly and bag them both.

Fifteen minutes into the match, for ten of those minutes, both of them were sitting on a black screen, locked in an intense flame war.

In a profanity-free argument, they were evenly matched—which was surprising, given that Xia Tongxin was supposedly the queen of trash talk!

Her specialty was throwing shade without a single curse word, whispering poison into the air. Yet despite fighting on Xia Tongxin's home turf, Tang Yuyao held her ground, dishing it out steadily. But you could tell she was about to lose control of her second personality—because Ye Cheng could hear screams and roars from the next room, along with what sounded like things being thrown.

Ye Cheng: "..."

Was Doctor Tang about to mutate or something?

As for the Head Maid... she was still on the gold grind. She had the highest gold in the entire game now, and anyone who challenged her died on the spot.

Time came to 20 minutes!

"BOOM!"

The enemy nexus exploded.

The Head Maid had backdoored it, solo-carrying the other four players to victory.

On the score screen, the Head Maid earned a silver medal, Ye Cheng a gold MVP, and the other three players' combined ratings were lower than Ye Cheng's alone.

Ye Cheng: "Whew, I'm exhausted. That was such a tough match."

Head Maid: "..."

The Head Maid stared at the screen twice, double-checking the stats before reluctantly accepting that she had been a "carried dog" undeserving of the win.

Fighting rules wasn't as good as exploiting them—on this point, Ye Cheng had succeeded brilliantly.

As for Xia Tongxin and Tang Yuyao... they were still going at it.

The fires of battle were still roaring!