Oh no Something's wrong, Brother Doudou, the young lady is dead

6:30 in the morning.

"Beep beep beep..."

Shen Ming, who had just fallen asleep not long ago, forced himself awake, looking a bit dazed. The lights in the room were still on, and sunlight was already streaming in from outside.

Wait... it was dawn!

Shen Ming took another look at the scene in the room and was completely stunned.

The eldest daughter was still struggling!

Also half-dead was Ye Cheng, who was busy shuffling cards for the eldest daughter, trying to use his techniques to reverse her "black coffin death luck." Every time she was about to draw, Ye Cheng would nudge the cards just a little.

Then, through subtle psychological hints, he guided the eldest daughter to pick the corresponding point card from his hand.

If she followed the routine, the game would end within five minutes, without a doubt. But... fate had other plans. The eldest daughter was no ordinary person.

Every time, despite Ye Cheng's ample hints, she resolutely chose the card right next to it.

Ye Cheng: "..."

Amazing, eldest daughter. I have nothing to say!

Ye Cheng couldn't figure out whether she saw through his little tricks and was just tormenting him on purpose, or if her luck was truly in a league of its own—destined to fail.

Another round, another reveal!

"8 points!"

Right at the finish line, right at the door. Ye Cheng was so emotional he almost cried. Yes, that's it, eldest daughter, go ahead and draw! The 1 was already prepared right in front of you.

To control the variables, Ye Cheng had specifically suggested "increasing the difficulty" in the later part to stir her competitive spirit.

It seemed like he was raising the stakes, but he was actually handing her the win.

Multiple decks were set up. Given her tendency to pick randomly, Ye Cheng had even predicted all the possible "random" choices she might make, ensuring they would lead to the correct answer.

Shuffle, shuffle, shuffle!

Ye Cheng shuffled the cards again, placing all the 1s right in front of the eldest daughter, the most convenient spot!

Shen Qinghan stared at the cards before her, hesitated momentarily, pondered for a long while, and then resolutely picked the 7-point card right next to the 1 Ye Cheng had so carefully prepared.

Ye Cheng: "..."

Just as the card was about to be pulled away—

Slap!

"Eldest daughter, I think you need to pick again. Actually, no, I need to reshuffle. I feel like I didn't shuffle them evenly. Let me start over."

Ye Cheng's gaze was firm as he looked at Shen Qinghan. She frowned, looking a bit displeased, but still let go of the card.

"Hurry up, I'm about to win."

Ye Cheng: "..."

Amazing!!!

Eldest daughter, do you see anyone else around anymore?

With this ridiculous rule, everyone else had passed in their own way—except for the eldest daughter. She was getting tripped up by the rules she set herself! Who else?!

"Alright, eldest daughter, this humble servant also thinks you're about to win."

Shuffle, shuffle, shuffle...

With his expert shuffling skills, Ye Cheng once again placed the standard correct answer in front of the eldest daughter.

She reached out—

Slap!

"Eldest daughter, um... my hand just cramped up. Probably not the best for your luck. Give me one more chance!"

Shuffle, shuffle...

Slap!

"Eldest daughter, my foot just cramped up..."

Slap!

"Eldest daughter, you know I'm one to have three tries..."

Slap...

"Thump, thump, thump!"

Ye Cheng: "..."

"4 points." Shen Qinghan frowned slightly and retreated back to the starting point.

Ye Cheng: "..."

Someone, save me!!!

Ye Cheng was at his wit's end. For some reason, from just a moment ago, the combination of the rafters and the rope in the room seemed to be taunting him, daring him to use them?

Shuffle, shuffle... Ye Cheng kept shuffling. The eldest daughter kept drawing. The cycle of what they'd been doing for hours continued.

All of this was caught by Shen Ming's eyes.

Shen Ming: "???"

Damn, is this for real? They're still at it?

Shen Ming stared in disbelief. Compared to these two, he felt like a total rookie. He clearly didn't need to be here trying to set them up—they had their own rhythm going.

If he'd known, he would've just gone to bed. Those two—his sister, Hanhan, and little Ye Cheng—could play by themselves all day long.

"Beep beep beep..."

The phone rang again, snapping Shen Ming back to reality. He was about to pick it up when he suddenly felt a heavy weight pressing down on him, like a boulder blocking his chest.

He looked down... Da Huang's rear end.

Shen Ming: "..."

Silently, Shen Ming gently lifted the soundly sleeping Da Huang aside, rubbed his aching head, walked forward, and picked up the phone.

"Hello... who's this..."

Shen Ming's voice was heavy with exhaustion.

There was a brief silence on the other end, and then his wife's voice came through like the sky was falling: "Dou Dou, you've been playing with another woman behind my back!"

Shen Ming: "..."

One sentence, and Bro Dou Dou's brain was instantly rebooted, wide awake like never before.

He glanced at the clock on the wall—6:30 in the morning, actually 6:30 AM.

So why was his other half up so early today?

For a second, Shen Ming wondered if he was still dreaming, or if he'd eaten too many hallucinogenic mushrooms, because how else could he be seeing and hearing so many insane things at this hour?

But what really got Shen Ming was that what she said actually seemed true, in a certain way.

To some degree, he was indeed playing with another woman behind her back—Xiao Lan, Hanhan, and as for Da Huang...

Hmm... uncertain. Shen Ming glanced.

Yeah, it's male. That's fine.

"This is too much. I want a divorce, boohoo..." The voice on the phone tore up in sobs.

Shen Ming: "..."

"We are playing, but..."

"What?!"

"Goddammit, Shen Ming, I'll cut you into pieces! You actually dared to do that? Just wait, I'm flying back right now to kill you!!!"

Before he could finish, Du Wanyi's voice exploded on the other end, so loud that Shen Ming covered his ears, his face twitching as he moved the phone away.

"Let me finish, Wanyi..."

"Finish my ass! #@%$..."

A barrage of profanities followed, so foul that Shen Ming felt like his entire family tree was being torn apart in a circle of attacks he could barely withstand.

And he even thought he heard some self-insults from his other half herself?

She's tough enough to roast herself?

Shen Ming's mouth twitched. "I was playing with Hanhan and Xiao Lan. What are you even thinking, huh?"

There was a brief silence on the phone, then his wife's gentle voice returned.

"Aiya, Dou Dou, did someone pick up my phone and say something just now? You okay? Damn, it must have been my second personality—she's drawn to the dark, corrupt at heart..."

Shen Ming: "..."

Du Wanyi dared to say it, but Shen Ming didn’t dare to listen—it was too awkward, utterly shameless.

“Dou Dou, are you okay? Hey, I just taught my second personality a lesson; she promised she won’t come out again and gave a deep self-criticism. Love you, muah~”

Shen Ming: “…”

“Wanyi, why are you up so early today?” Shen Ming sighed and pulled the conversation back.

“Up early? I haven’t slept at all. Hehe and I were watching a horror movie. Hehe just dozed off, I think. I had nothing to do, so I called you… Oh, no, it was my second personality who called you just now.”

Shen Ming: “…”

Watching a horror movie?

Fell asleep?

“Wanyi, are you… sure she didn’t pass out? Maybe you should take another look?” Shen Ming said uncertainly.

His wife wasn’t just fearless—what she found trivial was sheer terror to others. She’d once strapped Shen Ming into a chair and forced him to watch the entire Ju-On series. The loudest version, no less. No exaggeration, Kayako was practically right in his face.

Meanwhile, his wife sat nearby, munching popcorn, looking thrilled. Back then, Shen Ming felt like his soul was leaving his body—in a haze, it felt like he’d regressed to childhood.

Whether it was a life flashing before his eyes, he couldn’t say. All he knew was when he woke up again, it was already daylight.

“Impossible! Hehe’s pretty brave. But forget that—let’s talk business!” Du Wanyi’s voice suddenly turned serious.

Shen Ming straightened up, also focusing. Business.

“What are you guys playing?”

Shen Ming: “…”

“Monopoly, Dou Di Zhu, and… Ludo,” Shen Ming said hesitantly, glancing at Ye Cheng, who was still shuffling cards nearby, coaxing the young miss into drawing.

“Damn it. Those are my favorite games! Why, why right now? Dou Dou, you’re too much—I’m divorcing you!”

On the other end, his wife’s voice came through, gritting her teeth.

Shen Ming: “…”

“If there’s nothing else, I’ll hang up. I’ve got to head to the office soon.” Shen Ming sighed helplessly.

Then, as if remembering something, he glanced at his daughter Han Han nearby and lowered his voice: “Oh, by the way, Wanyi, when are you coming back? You can run, but you can’t hide forever.”

“What did you do that’s so scary?”

What did she do… Images scattered through Du Wanyi’s mind—being tied up, bugs, kissing, a recording…

And a feeling she was doomed.

Du Wanyi: “…”

Great memories. Not coming back.

“Ahem. Don’t worry about that. Who said anything about being scared? What kind of talk is that? Do I even need to mention my status at home?”

Du Wanyi coughed twice, reaffirming her “domestic supremacy.”

“I know what I’m doing, Dou Dou. You don’t need to trouble yourself with other stuff. Oh, right, Dou Dou, there’s one more thing I need to tell you.”

“A thing? What thing? Wanyi, you didn’t go and smash up someone else’s place again, did you?” Shen Ming asked cautiously.

“What talk? What talk is that! In your heart, am I really that unreasonable woman! Waaah, you jerk—this marriage is over! I’m divorcing you, waaah…”

“Uh, sorry, Wanyi, I misjudged you. So this thing…”

“Haha, silly Dou Dou, you fell for it! You guessed right—I did smash another place!”

The phone exploded with his wife’s wildly arrogant laughter, showing no regret, only pure pride in her handiwork.

Shen Ming: “…”

“I’ll tell you the details when I get back. Anyway, I was awesome. Unbelievable. There were like dozens of big guys around, but I wasn’t scared at all. I held Hehe, who was trembling in fear…”

Shen Ming skipped the rest of her bragging—abbreviated ten thousand words.

“Wanyi, you said you had something to tell me? What is it?”

Shen Ming checked the time, sighed, and pulled the conversation back again.

“Oh, let me finish! You always do this. Didn’t your family teach you? When others are boasting, you should slap them. But when I’m boasting, you clap and listen patiently—clap and cheer me on…”

Shen Ming: “…”

“It’s nothing major. Just that soon, two people will be coming to our house. Hehe and her crew are moving in with us. No specific date yet—it should be fine once I poison that old man to death.”

On the other end, Du Wanyi rubbed her smooth chin, as if deep in thought.

Shen Ming: “…”

Shen Ming shook his head helplessly. No doubt about it—his wife had stirred up trouble again and said some bizarre things.

Hehe… that must be Xia He?

Instinctively, Shen Ming pictured a mature woman—a textbook example of someone outwardly gentle but inwardly strong. Why would she move into someone else’s home?

He didn’t dwell on it. He just chalked it up to his wife having had too much to drink or bragging again, making things up as she went. In reality…

“Holy crap, something’s wrong! Brother Dou Dou, the young miss is dead!”

Ye Cheng’s panicked voice rang out from nearby.

Shen Ming: “???”

Du Wanyi: “???”

Who? Who died?