The "Foolproof" Plan, an Ominous Premonition, and the Little Secretary's Hamster Equation

"That idiot..."

*Tap-tap-tap.* Dongfang Zhixia descended from the second floor, her phone in hand, seemingly messaging someone on the other end... She was going to wipe away her shame!

Today, in front of so many people, she had suffered a massive humiliation. She had thought the game was in the bag, only to be completely steamrolled. It was an utter disgrace!

She hadn't wanted to resort to this... but since a certain holier-than-thou individual had decided to use underhanded tactics, she wasn't going to be polite about it either. She was going to win this back, and it was going to be an absolute, crushing victory!

Fundamentally, this whole voting business was like children playing house—extremely childish. Dongfang Zhixia usually considered it beneath her to get serious about such things. However... she didn't necessarily have to win, but she absolutely could not lose!

Especially when it came to the matter of Shen Qinghan, there was no possibility of Dongfang Zhixia backing down. Since the cheating had started, let's all cheat together! Kick out anyone who isn't cheating!

That's just how the world works. When everyone is playing fair, a single hacker sticks out like a sore thumb. But if everyone is hacking, the problem disappears. Because if everyone is cheating, it's equivalent to no one cheating. Round it up, and everyone is basically playing fair again.

Since we are all "playing fair" now, it just comes down to who has the greater resources!

Dongfang Zhixia looked at the voting numbers on her phone. As the Red Team, she had completely crushed the Blue Team. The "Young Miss" ticket had ten thousand votes, while "Madam President's" side had been botted straight up to twenty thousand!!!

Just moments ago, Dongfang Zhixia had been upstairs arranging this. The technical team raised by the Dongfang family reported that after hitting twenty thousand votes, they couldn't push it any further. They had reached the absolute ceiling. The entire school—students, teachers, and staff included—didn't even necessarily have twenty thousand people.

Now that the voting results for the Young Miss and Madam President were out, every single account in the school had been commandeered and used to vote. Currently, Madam President was poised for a sure victory.

"Young Miss, unless the other side plays dirty and lifts the restrictions on the school forum, there is absolutely no way they can surpass you!"

This was the exact report from her subordinate. Dongfang Zhixia was very satisfied with this answer. If Shen Qinghan wanted to surpass her now, she'd have to flip the table over entirely. Otherwise, she would forever be a head shorter than her!

Thinking of this, the corners of Dongfang Zhixia's mouth curled up. She put her phone away and sat on the sofa. Looking at the empty first floor, she felt like something was missing.

Missing... a certain idiot who called her "Miss."

"Why is that idiot so active today?" Dongfang Zhixia frowned. She felt like something was off, and the more she thought about it, the stranger it seemed.

The little secretary received a few hundred in pocket money every month. After various deductions and penalties, the final amount for this month was 500. Originally, it was twenty a day, which would have been 600 a month.

But Madam President had ruthlessly deducted a hundred, leaving only five hundred in hand.

The little secretary had been living off the Dongfang family for so many years, eating and drinking for free, so naturally, there was no salary. Given the secretary's competence, the cost of screw-ups and damages caused already exceeded any potential salary.

With no other choice, they rounded things off, resulting in the secretary "working" for free, but receiving three thousand in allowance per month.

Yes... that's right. In the beginning, the allowance was quite high—a full one hundred a day. But because of reckless spending on junk food, which nearly caused obesity, there was a period where the secretary transformed into the "Little Fatty Edition." Madam President was furious!

The result was Madam President slashing the allowance all the way down, finally stabilizing it in the range of five hundred to eight hundred.

This was effectively enough for the little secretary to eat two savory street pancakes every afternoon...

It was truly like a primary school student getting their allowance. The first thing they’d do after school was run to the school gates to spend the coins they got from their parents.

Simply put, if there were two coins in their pocket, they both had to go into their mouth.

The coins used to arrest Ye Cheng previously were actually the pocket money the little secretary had saved up, coin by coin...

It wasn't certain that the little secretary spent money every time they went out. Most of the time, they would follow Dongfang Zhixia straight home, having already eaten at the school cafeteria. Even if they got hungry, there was frozen food at home.

But for some unknown reason... the little secretary was like a school kid addicted to spicy gluten strips. They refused to eat the clean, hygienic, and healthy food at home, insisting on eating meat burgers, savory pancakes, and fried skewers from outside. She had lectured them many times to no avail; it nearly angered Madam President to death.

But since this allowance was agreed upon at the start as money to be spent freely, Madam President couldn't control it too strictly, unless she wanted to go back on her word.

Aside from fixed times, it was mostly like today, a Friday afternoon. The little secretary would take their little wallet, calculate the delicious treats for the day, and skip off happily to buy food.

Dongfang Zhixia sometimes tagged along, but she knew that if she saw the little secretary eating unhealthy things, she wouldn't be able to stop herself from nagging.

So, most of the time, she let the little secretary go alone, treating it as "personal space." After all, eating those snacks was when the little secretary was happiest.

Dongfang Zhixia really didn't want to play the role of a "strict parent" at times like this. It wouldn't be good to leave the child with psychological trauma.

Although Madam President had only just turned eighteen this year, she already had many years of experience "raising a child" and radiated a considerable amount of "maternal glory."

Precisely because of this layer of "maternal glory," every time Dongfang Zhixia saw the little secretary fooling around with Ye Cheng, she felt a sense of foreboding.

It felt like the cabbage she had raised herself was being rooted up by a pig. She was so angry she couldn't sleep!

Absolutely not!

Dongfang Zhixia had already researched "this issue" deeply. The little secretary was only in their early twenties, not too old, so there was no rush regarding a partner. However, the little secretary's significant other had to be approved by her first.

Furthermore, she would only accept a matrilocal marriage where the groom moved in; she wouldn't accept the little secretary marrying out. What if they were mistreated? That child wasn't very bright—what if they got bullied? What if...

Dongfang Zhixia had many worries. She was willing to let go, but there was a limit and a distance to that letting go; it couldn't be too far.

Anyway, they were still young. Let nature take its course. If the little secretary didn't have that intention, then fine. If they did, later on, she, as the Young Miss, would help scout for suitable social elites. The Dongfang family was huge and wealthy; surely they could find a suitable person?

The other party didn't need to have money, but their character and personality had to be up to par. They couldn't bully the little secretary...

As for other aspects... to be added later.

It could be anyone else, but it absolutely could not be a certain guy... because that certain guy... had kissed her.

Dongfang Zhixia had a mental ruler she used to evaluate and classify Ye Cheng. As for what stage he had reached on that scale, only the Madam President herself, the party involved, knew the answer.

However, one thing was certain... she didn't hate him.

As a child, Dongfang Zhixia had fantasized about what her other half would be like. He had to be more capable than her; anyone weaker was trash, and trash was not worthy of being her partner.

The confession also had to have a sense of ritual. He had to be good-looking so their future children wouldn't be ugly and would inherit their perfect genes...

Thinking it over carefully, Dongfang Zhixia discovered an incredibly absurd fact: a certain bastard seemed to... fit all the criteria.

A confession with a "sense of ritual"—in a sense, that massive social suicide scene at the opening ceremony counted as a "ritual." As for IQ, there was nothing to say; Ye Cheng had entered with the top score based on his own strength, firmly suppressing the tied Young Miss and Madam President.

Some exam questions simply weren't meant for humans to solve... Hey, wouldn't you know it? What a coincidence, it was right up his alley!

Ye Cheng's success was by no means accidental. Aside from hard work and sweat, there was only that "insignificant," "not worth mentioning," "negligible" one percent of talent.

When Ye Cheng flipped down from the balcony with one hand and pointed at Li Yong to challenge him to a duel, and Li Yong wore that expression like the "Fire Punch eating sh*t meme," he must have been thinking exactly that:

I see the hard work, but why is the sweat on my forehead?

Sense of ritual, IQ, being stronger than her—it all seemed to match up. As for his looks...

Subconsciously, the scene she saw on the balcony that night surfaced in Dongfang Zhixia's mind again... those superb muscle lines!

Hmph... Ahem, barely a pass.

One could roast Ye Cheng for everything else, but his "character modeling" was maxed out. Even the always arrogant Madam President had to admit that his looks were indeed "alright," "just passable," or "so-so."

After this evaluation, Ye Cheng "barely" counted as having successfully advanced past Madam President's basic requirements for a significant other. As for the rest, it would depend on Ye Cheng's performance.

Moreover, if her other half was that certain bastard, she could incidentally "elbow drop" a certain self-righteous individual. Killing two birds with one stone—why not do it?

She certainly wouldn't lose to a "bot" with character defects...

"Forget it, let's go see that idiot..." Dongfang Zhixia wore a confident smile on her lips. She seemed to be in a very good mood. Originally, this was her time for exercise, but since she was in high spirits, she changed her mind and decided to accompany her little secretary shopping. She would pay.

The corners of Dongfang Zhixia's mouth curled up. She could already imagine the little secretary's expression upon seeing her—the scene shifting from a guilty conscience to jumping around in excitement.

Consider today a rare reward!

...

Meanwhile.

In an inconspicuous corner of the academy, two people were squatting there, whispering about something.

"Hamster, are you sure Madam President didn't suspect anything?"

"Mhm, mhm! The Miss believed my words. She didn't suspect a thing!"

Ye Cheng looked at the "super confident" little secretary nodding incessantly before him and fell into silence... Why did he have a feeling of foreboding?

It must be... an illusion, right?

Forget it, never mind!

Ye Cheng stood up and reminded her once again, "Remember, you absolutely cannot tell your Miss about what happened today, nor can you let her find out. Otherwise, we're both done for. Do you hear me, Hamster?"

Seeing Ye Cheng stand up, the little secretary followed suit. She blinked her big, sparkling eyes and nodded very seriously.

"Mhm, mhm! I got it, Baddie. I promise the Miss won't find out!"

"Hmm, very good. Very spirited!" Ye Cheng looked at the little secretary before him with appreciation, wearing an expression that said, "This child is worth teaching."

"Then can I have one extra Roujiamo later?" The little secretary blinked her big, sparkling eyes, attempting to bargain with Ye Cheng.

Ye Cheng gave a wicked smile, channeling the "Crooked Mouth Dragon King": "Of course... not."

The little secretary pouted. "Hmph, stingy ghost..."

"No, no, no. I am not a stingy ghost." Ye Cheng, currently possessing sharp ears and eyes, naturally heard the little secretary's quiet muttering. He extended a finger and wagged it in front of her.

"You clearly are. Hmph..." The little secretary pursed her lips.

"Bro isn't a stingy ghost; Bro is a poor ghost." Ye Cheng's tone was full of confidence. The little secretary listened in a daze, blinking her large, sparkling eyes.

The little secretary nodded. After thinking for a moment, she "corrected" her previous statement: "Oh, oh. Hmph, poor ghost..."

Ye Cheng: "..."

It had been a long time since he heard such blunt, acerbic, and mean... words. Although he had just said them himself, the fact that the little secretary repeated them without a second thought still made Ye Cheng feel a bit awkward.

This child was a little too "honest." If he said he was a poor ghost, she called him a poor ghost—no beating around the bush whatsoever.

After speaking, the little secretary added another sentence: "I'm a poor ghost too..."

Ye Cheng: "..."

When this kid got ruthless, did she even roast herself?

"That can't be right, Hamster. I remember you're Madam President's lackey... cough, number one henchman, aren't you? How could you have no money? Could it be that the Dongfang family is actually hollow on the inside and even deducted your wages, Hamster?"

Ye Cheng looked at the little secretary before him with curiosity. She and Madam President ate on the third floor of the cafeteria every day; they didn't look like people short of money at all.

Especially since the little secretary seemed to have a special significance to Madam President.

Ye Cheng had visited the Dongfang family's villa on campus not long ago. There were no servants or maids; only the little secretary and Madam President lived there together.

And looking at how clumsy the little secretary was, it was hard to say who was taking care of whom. In this situation, even ruling out the possibility that "Yuri is wonderful," their relationship was clearly extraordinary.

In Ye Cheng's view, even if Madam President just "leaked" a little bit from her fingers, the little secretary should be able to become a "Celestial Dragon" and ruthlessly dunk on a poor ghost like him. How could the little secretary be a poor ghost too?

It didn't make sense...

Or was it that Madam President's ugly capitalist face had become so dark that one couldn't see their own fingers in front of it, to the point where she even withheld the little secretary's wages?

"I don't have a salary..." The little secretary blinked at Ye Cheng and spoke.

Ye Cheng sucked in a breath of cold air... Holy sh*t, she really is shady!

Before Ye Cheng could speak, he heard the little secretary murmuring happily, "I'm too clumsy, so I don't get a salary, but the Young Miss gives me pocket money, hehe..."

Ye Cheng: "..."

This answer was a bit out of left field, wasn't it?

What Ye Cheng hadn't expected was that the little secretary was actually self-aware enough to realize she wasn't smart?

"How much pocket money?" Ye Cheng raised an eyebrow and continued asking.

"Six hundred! But I annoyed the Young Miss earlier, so now it's only five hundred... sob..." The little secretary started off excited and confident, but she wilted just as quickly.

Ye Cheng: "..."

"Per day?" Ye Cheng asked tentatively.

"If it's per day, that's two scallion pancakes. Oh, wait... now it's only one and a half." The little secretary pouted, her tone dipping into depression.

Ye Cheng: "???"

What the hell? Why is her allowance automatically converting into scallion pancakes? What kind of "Hamster" equation is this?

Ye Cheng sighed. "Sigh, putting it that way, you really don't have it easy."

The little secretary nodded. She took a step forward and hugged Ye Cheng's arm, looking up at him pitifully, her big eyes sparkling and blinking rapidly.

"Then can you treat me to an extra meat sandwich? Pretty please~"

Ye Cheng: "..."

After all that, Hamster, you were just waiting to trap me here, weren't you?

I treat you like a brother, pouring my heart out, and you're plotting against me?

Still thinking about meat sandwiches at a time like this... you're actually not stupid!

No, wait... it seems she really isn't that bright.

Who would have thought? As the two strongest individuals in the school—the Young Miss's top henchmen—we're both broke. This life is really too much.

Ye Cheng sighed. "Hamster, seeing as you have it rough, how about this? In the future, when your Young Miss attacks or gives me a hard time, you put in a good word for me. In exchange, this brother will take you out to feast on the best food. How about it?"

Ye Cheng raised a brow, sending out a "Party Invite."

The little secretary blinked and answered without thinking, "But, baddie, aren't you a broke ghost too? How are you going to take me out to feast?"

Ye Cheng: "..."

Damn Hamster, your attack power is a bit high!

"Cough cough. I am broke, that's true. However, I have my ways to get you good food. Just tell me, are you in or not?" Ye Cheng coughed twice, continuing to bamboozle the dazed little secretary before him.

The little secretary shook her head. "No way. The Young Miss will be unhappy."

So loyal?

Ye Cheng raised an eyebrow. After thinking for a moment, he spoke again. "Then what if I take you to eat scallion pancakes, meat sandwiches, potato chips, and fried skewers every day...?"

"Let's pinky swear! Whoever lies is a puppy." The little secretary extended her hand with lightning speed to seal the deal, terrified Ye Cheng would regret his offer. There was no loyalty to her Young Miss left; there was only the "wisdom" of a brain controlled by cupcakes and scallion pancakes.

Ye Cheng: "..."