Pairs

(Shangguan Meng's Side Story)

"Is that so? I see... Okay, okay, come on, I’ve already said that there was never anything between us!"

"I’m not going on blind dates because I’m not interested, not because of Mo Xuan."

Helplessly calming Huang Ya down, Shangguan Meng put her phone aside with a bitter smile. Perhaps her feelings for Mo Xuan had lasted too long, making her best friend doubt that she had truly moved on.

Looking at the coupon she had turned into a bookmark, Shangguan Meng felt a wave of nostalgia wash over her.

Had she let go? Yes, she had.

But could she truly forget him completely? That would be lying to herself.

For Shangguan Meng, that boy had been like a beautiful dream since her teenage years. Yet, due to her introverted nature and the high-pressure upbringing from her parents, her insecurities had kept her from taking that step forward.

"Even if the two of you had ended up together, it might not have been a good thing. Just look at your personalities, tsk tsk tsk."

Suddenly recalling Huang Ya’s words of comfort, Shangguan Meng chuckled wryly. She had once seen how Mo Xuan treated Su Yanran from the closest distance, and she had also witnessed how he treated Luo Shiya and Luo Muqi now.

She always believed that Mo Xuan would make a good partner—perhaps even a good husband. But all of that seemed irrelevant to her, as if it had never been meant for her in the first place.

After the hospital incident, she had never seen Mo Xuan again. She had blocked him on all social media, thinking that one day, when she had truly moved on, she might meet him again.

They were fated but not destined to be each other’s other half. Yet, they could still be good friends.

Perhaps, when they met again, she could smile as naturally as Mo Xuan, who remained oblivious, and greet him with a simple, "Long time no see, Mo Xuan."

Almost two years had passed since then. She had lost track of time. Since that day, Shangguan Meng had thrown herself into her work and studies. Occasionally, when she saw that coupon, she would still think of Mo Xuan.

But the sadness of unrequited love was no longer there. Instead, she felt a sense of relief, imagining how happy he must be now with that rare pair of sisters.

"Isn’t this a form of letting go?"

A colleague, upon hearing her story and her current feelings, smiled thoughtfully and said, "Not many people can do what you’ve done. Even in unrequited love, where the other person remains unaware, there’s often a lingering sense of unwillingness."

"I don’t know why," Shangguan Meng replied after a moment of thought. "I guess the only thing I’ve ever truly cared about was whether he was happy or not. Maybe it’s because I was too insecure to have a chance with him in the first place."

"Not at all," the colleague teased. "In fact, I think your kind of love is admirable. After all, human nature is selfish—we all want to be with the ones we love forever."

"Being able to hold onto that selfishness and remain devoted to someone is the best, because people are fickle. In this day and age, staying true to someone is already quite rare."

"But being able to let go of that selfishness and wish for their happiness is even rarer. Sometimes, letting go can be more painful and difficult than holding on."

The colleague stood up and patted her shoulder. "Shangguan, in that sense, you’re truly remarkable."

Shangguan Meng felt a little embarrassed by the praise. She didn’t think she was that great; she had simply done what she believed was right.

Huang Ya, after some searching, finally found Luo Muqi’s social media through a mutual friend from the art department. There were plenty of updates, including photos of Mo Xuan.

Seeing Mo Xuan in the pictures, Shangguan Meng couldn’t help but marvel at how unchanged he seemed, as if time had stood still for him.

Unlike before, Mo Xuan was smiling in every photo—a genuine, happy smile. Sometimes, Luo Muqi would even pull him into playful selfies.

Even in the most recent photo, the love between Luo Muqi and Mo Xuan was palpable, radiating through the lens.

If the younger sister was like this, how could the older sister be any different?

Of course, Shangguan Meng couldn’t have guessed that Mo Xuan’s current life could be described as a sweet burden. After all, at home, he had two women who occasionally slipped into their dramatic tendencies...

"See? You’re still not over him, are you?" Huang Ya teased at the right moment. "Otherwise, why would you want to check up on him?"

Shangguan Meng simply smiled. Some things were hard to explain. It wasn’t that she hadn’t moved on; she just wanted to see him happy.

Back then, Mo Xuan had been genuinely unhappy. She had been careful around him, never daring to get too close, but always hoping to offer him some comfort, even if it was just a little.

Even now, though she could face the past with ease, she still wished for his happiness. That was all...

Spring turned to autumn, and soon it was winter again. Snow was falling, and New Year’s Day was just around the corner. Shangguan Meng, dressed in a white down jacket, walked down the street with a cup of warm milk tea in her hand.

The shops were decorated with festive lights, and the streets were bustling with people. She sipped her tea quietly, enjoying the peaceful walk.

One store, standing out from the rest, had hired a children’s choir to sing "Happy New Year." Shangguan Meng couldn’t help but stop to watch for a moment. As she turned to leave, she accidentally bumped into a man carrying a stack of documents.

The ground was slippery from the snow, and Shangguan Meng nearly fell. The man quickly grabbed her hand to steady her, but in the process, his documents scattered everywhere, and her milk tea spilled all over him.

"I’m so sorry! I was in a hurry!"

The man apologized profusely as he crouched down to gather the scattered papers. Even though the tea had spilled on them, he didn’t complain once.

"Let me help you," Shangguan Meng offered, picking up some of the documents. They appeared to be chemistry lab reports, with neat handwritten notes.

"Thank you, thank you!"

Shangguan Meng found it amusing. She was the one who had bumped into him, yet he kept apologizing.

It was only then that she got a good look at him. He seemed to be around her age, clean-cut and unassuming, with a somewhat naive air about him, though he came across as a bit clumsy.

As she handed the collected documents back to him, the man looked up to thank her. But when his eyes met Shangguan Meng’s, his face turned bright red, and he quickly looked away, flustered.

"I’m really sorry about your documents..."

"It’s fine, it’s fine! I was the one rushing," the man said awkwardly, scratching his nose. "I’ll buy you another milk tea. Wait here for a moment!"

Before Shangguan Meng could refuse, he dashed off to a nearby tea shop. She could only smile helplessly and wait.

Soon, he returned with a new cup of tea. Shangguan Meng took out her phone and said, "Let me pay you back. It was my fault..."

"No, no, I told you it was my fault for rushing!"

He insisted on giving her the tea and then took a closer look at her. Suddenly, his eyes lit up. "You’re Dr. Shangguan, aren’t you?"

Shangguan Meng was surprised. The man’s eyes sparkled as he said, "I remember you! I saw you comforting a depressed student at the hospital!"

Shangguan Meng vaguely recalled the incident. She had treated a young girl who, much like her past self, had suffered a mental breakdown due to overwhelming pressure from her parents.

It was the first time the usually gentle Shangguan Meng had lost her temper, sternly reprimanding the girl’s parents.

"I happened to be at the hospital that day, and I’ve remembered your name ever since."

The man gave her a warm, sincere smile, his eyes filled with such honesty and simplicity that Shangguan Meng couldn’t help but blush and look away.

"Please, don’t say that. I’m a doctor; it’s my job," Shangguan Meng replied, her cheeks red. "Are you a student or...?"

"Oh, my name is Meng Ran. I'm currently a Ph.D. student, specializing in chemical pharmaceuticals," Meng Ran replied, a bit shyly. "Actually, that time your hospital consulted my mentor about some medications, and I just happened to tag along. I didn’t expect to witness that scene."

Somehow, the two of them ended up standing there, chatting. Shangguan Meng felt an unusual connection with this person named Meng Ran. It was the first time she had ever felt so at ease talking to someone of the opposite sex.

At that moment, the children's choir nearby began singing a Cantonese song:

"The moon shines bright, accompanied by the stars, look up at the sky full of teary stars.

One pair by day, one pair by night, fireflies in pairs.

The night is quiet, all beings accompanied, the rain falls gently, the wind gathers.

Coming in pairs, leaving in pairs, falling petals in pairs.

Ask the fireflies, who do they illuminate? Not afraid of exhaustion, but afraid of sleeping alone.

Flapping their wings, they fly into the vast sky.

What’s wrong with that? Even in the icy snow, they remain in pairs."

The two of them fell into a taciturn silence, quietly listening to the entire song.

Suddenly, Meng Ran looked at Shangguan Meng and smiled brightly, "By the way, happy New Year in advance, Dr. Shangguan!"

"Happy New Year, Meng Ran."

Shangguan Meng responded with a warm smile.

Perhaps, with the new year, everything would be different.