Prime Minister 08

The eunuchs' faces all turned pale.

"Fang Zhiyi, do you know who we are?"

Fang Zhiyi spread his hands: "You're all so clever, appearing here together. Do you really think I don't know who you are?"

The eunuchs suddenly understood: "You—how did you know?"

Fang Zhiyi found it amusing. What a joke—when it came to intelligence, he was their ancestor!

"My patience is thin. One sentence: if you don’t want to die, you’ll obey me from now on. If you do want to die—well, you can die right now."

"Fang Zhiyi, attacking the secret guards—are you plotting treason?" one eunuch shouted.

Fang Zhiyi promptly stabbed him with a knife, twisting the blade in his chest before pulling it out. "I heard some people have their hearts on the right side." He stabbed again on the right.

Then, rubbing his chin, he mused: "A bit troublesome. Better just cut off the head."

The other eunuchs were terrified. Since when had this prime minister become so ruthless? He looked like a butcher!

When Fang Zhiyi sat back down, half his face was smeared with blood. He casually placed the freshly severed head aside. "So, what’s your answer?"

The eunuchs hesitated, uncertain.

"Lord Fang, Prime Minister Fang, our leader is the Chief Eunuch by the Emperor’s side! What use is it to threaten us?"

Fang Zhiyi glanced at the knife in his hand. "In any case, if you follow me, I’ll ensure your future wealth and status. You know full well that the Emperor’s treasury is filled by my efforts."

At the mention of money, the eunuchs wavered.

"You—Xiaofuzi, right? You have a younger brother running a shop in the western part of the capital, about to get married?"

"You—quite the philanthropist, adopting several children, I hear they’re adorable."

"And you..."

Within an hour, they had all defected. Fang Zhiyi wielded both carrot and stick—fear made them spill everything, swearing absolute loyalty.

Fang Zhiyi smiled and clapped his hands. Another man was brought in.

When Fang Zhiyi removed the blindfold, the eunuchs gasped. "Eunuch Cao!"

"When the Emperor stays overnight at the Moonlit Pavilion, Eunuch Cao is never allowed inside." Fang Zhiyi patted his shoulder, grinning.

Eunuch Cao roared in fury: "Traitor! You dare collude with the imperial guards to capture me? I demand to see His Majesty!"

Fang Zhiyi ignored him. He knew well how loyal the Emperor’s personal eunuch would be.

"Now, each of you stab him once. Consider it our pact sealed." Fang Zhiyi stood, casually cutting their bonds with two slashes before tossing down daggers.

He left them with those words.

Eunuch Cao kept cursing, but when he saw his own subordinates pick up the knives, panic set in.

"What are you doing?!"

"Eunuch Cao, I just remembered—when I first entered the palace, you had me strung up and beaten half to death."

"Eunuch Cao, rest in peace."

Soon, Eunuch Cao fell silent forever.

The remaining eunuchs stood in solemn reverence.

"This servant greets our master!"

Fang Zhiyi shook his head—why did this suddenly feel like he was the Emperor? It was an unsettling thought.

As he dug deeper, he realized he had overestimated the Emperor. The so-called secret guards were just a bunch of eunuchs and informants—no martial skills, no principles, mostly used to spy on court officials.

In other words, from now on, the Emperor was deaf and blind. He would only hear what Fang Zhiyi wanted him to hear. Orders went ignored; the new eunuchs bowed respectfully but turned a deaf ear.

The Emperor grew frantic, calling for guards—but they had vanished.

The old generals rallied their veterans, recruiting troops openly without imperial interference.

Meanwhile, the Hu envoy was ambushed just outside the capital. The scene was reportedly gruesome.

Fang Zhiyi presided over the next two court sessions. No one suspected anything—he had done so before.

But soon, things grew strange.

First, rebel armies emerged, resupplied in the capital before marching north. The surrender faction in court panicked, but Fang Zhiyi merely said, "His Majesty has arrangements in hand."

Then, officials began getting purged in waves.

Observers saw the pattern—the court was being reshuffled. With the Emperor absent and Fang Zhiyi pulling strings, whispers spread among the people: the Prime Minister had usurped imperial power.

"My lord, people are slandering you behind your back," A'bao fumed.

Fang Zhiyi was discussing matters with Shen Xun.

"Oh? And?"

"I wanted to beat them up!"

"Who?"

"That Ministry of Personnel clerk. Drunk at a tavern today, he called you greedy, said you’ve blinded the Emperor!"

Fang Zhiyi chuckled. "Let me teach you something useful."

"If you badmouth others behind their back, it reflects poorly on you. If they badmouth you behind yours, it reflects even worse on them."

He sipped his tea.

"But my lord, he wasn’t alone."

"Then they must know each other."

Shen Xun inhaled sharply—the Prime Minister’s logic was impeccable!

As the northern campaign stalled, an imperial edict arrived, urging the troops forward like a shot of morale. The Hu forces retreated in defeat.

Only Young General Wei sensed something amiss.

"This edict is written in plain speech—sounds like Fang Zhiyi’s doing."

"General, even Fang Zhiyi wouldn’t dare forge an imperial decree."

"Hmm... just a feeling. By the way, where’s Fang Bufan?"

"Charged ahead."

"That idiot! Leading from the front again?"

With Old General Huang’s flanking reinforcements, the day ended in victory. That night, the officers gathered, boasting and dreaming aloud.

"You youngsters are all green," Old General Huang declared after a few drinks.

"Back in my first battle, seven or eight enemies came at me with sabers—I didn’t even flinch."

The crowd scoffed.

"Didn’t flinch because the first slash took out your tendons?"

Laughter erupted. Old General Huang flushed but turned to the heckler. "You!" He squinted. "I remember you—fought like a demon today. Got about thirty percent of my old flair. What’s your name?"

"Fang Bufan."

Old General Huang’s smile froze. After a pause: "Fang Zhiyi’s son?"

Fang Bufan nodded.

"Never thought that old scoundrel had such a fierce boy." The general tossed his wine pouch over.

Fang Bufan caught it, bewildered.

"Drink! What kind of man doesn’t drink?"