A Thoroughgoing Lazybones

Zhu Yan reached out and grabbed.

The white, icy fragments pressed cold and hard against his palm, while the puppets collectively descended into frenzy.

"Baby! Baby!"

A dozen voices shrieked in unison, piercing Zhu Yan's ears.

With a flick of his mind, he quickly stored the [Key Fragment 4] into his ring, then rolled deftly on the ground to dodge the nails of a headless puppet aiming for his back.

But this time, the puppets were noticeably faster.

They attacked Zhu Yan with near-madness, their elongated nails tearing across the surface of his cloak.

His saber swung back in defiance, slicing one puppet into four pieces in a flurry of moves.

"Damn it," Zhu Yan cursed.

If only Yang Zhanbai were here.

If only Yang Zhanbai were a higher level.

Yang Zhanbai’s ability [Shang Yang] wouldn’t have struggled any less with cutting these things down, would it?

The saber cleaved through a puppet’s waist, and Zhu Yan kicked it, sending the two halves sprawling apart.

He bent to pick up the finished picture frame from the floor, dodging and weaving among these immortal puppets.

...

Dragonfly felt as though its non-existent heart was clenched tight.

What was going on?

Judging by the screams, was a fight breaking out inside?

It pressed its head hard against the door; the sounds of combat and Half-Face Woman’s shrieks were unmistakable.

"Crap, she’s pissed!"

"Crap, pissed, pissed, pissed..."

Half-Face Woman was about to lose it, and Dragonfly’s tail whipped anxiously.

The thought of the hard-earned vacation slipping away made it miserable.

"Damn it! Should’ve given the kid a level 14 blade... but level 13’s not bad either!"

In theory, it should be enough to match Half-Face Woman’s combat power.

But it had never heard Half-Face Woman roar like this.

That [Hunter] was only level 7, so maybe...

"Game over?" Dragonfly stammered, its compound eyes wrinkling in dismay.

...

Fortunately, the level 13 saber was indeed formidable—

Ten minutes later, Zhu Yan stopped, panting, as he stomped on a severed hand crawling toward him.

"Enough," he said.

The floor was littered with broken limbs and torsos. Some writhed clumsily like insects, while others—like an upper half still attached to one arm—tried using that arm as a pair of "legs" to drag itself toward Zhu Yan.

The heads had resignedly fallen silent.

The one belonging to Half-Face Woman glared furiously, its eyeballs bulging outward.

"Wow," Zhu Yan said flatly. "You finally stopped screaming, didn’t you, baby?"

"ROAR—!"

Half-Face Woman let out a sudden, harsh screech, but Zhu Yan grabbed the head, and with a thought, ruthlessly stored it into his ring.

Silence fell.

He repeated the process with the other heads, curiosity stirring.

The [Fog] puppets could be stored in the ring because, once they lost [Fog]’s consciousness, they were just human corpses—lumps of dead flesh.

He hadn’t expected it to work when storing these grotesque heads, since they seemed alive and were clearly not decayed meat.

Yet it succeeded—

Did that mean these puppets in [Lazybones Craft Shop] contained no consciousness from the grotesque beings?

Then how were these grotesque beings controlling them?

If all high-level grotesques could use such puppets, wouldn’t that make them nearly impossible to kill?

Zhu Yan sighed at the thought.

"Forget it," he muttered to himself. "A small fry like me is lucky just to survive. Who cares if grotesques are hard to kill..."

He pulled over the battered wooden chair and sat down, opening [Roleplay] to dial the red telephone again.

"Hello."

This time, Zhu Yan used Half-Face Woman’s voice.

"I need the floor command for [Kitchen]. Ah, right... What?"

He frowned, explaining to the voice on the other end.

"I’m from Wutong Avenue Print Shop, delivering the [Changing Menu]."

Two seconds later, the pseudo-human on the other side gave him a reassuring response.

"Your identity has been verified."

"The floor change password is 'Delicious Feast.' Have a pleasant journey!"

...

Outside the door.

Dragonfly collapsed limply to the ground, a blissful grin spreading across its face.

"Thank heavens, thank [Joyous Paradise], he made the call!"

Oh, its Joyous Paradise—those screams earlier nearly scared the life out of it.

It had thought its own saber couldn’t beat its own puppets, and that the very convincing [Hunter] was done for!

"Oh, my vacation!"

Dragonfly was moved to tears, crawled up from the brass door, clicked its silver legs, and spun around in a circle.

"I love you, [Hunter]!"

Whatever the [Hunter]’s motives, he’d ultimately helped deliver the [Changing Menu] to the kitchen, so Dragonfly could now enjoy its vacation carefree and at ease.

Oh, right—it also had to rush back and call this [Hunter], give him a few tips as a fellow worker.

Dragonfly felt as if it were drunk, each step light as cotton, floating on air.

"Farewell, partner." It waved a bug leg stylishly at the brass door and bent in a comical bow.

"Farewell, dear [Hunter]. I’m off to enjoy my vacation!"

With that, it took two steps back and whispered the return password like a thief: "[Lazybones Craft Shop]!"

...

Zhu Yan hung up the phone.

Remembering Half-Face Woman’s mention of "packaging the [Changing Menu]," he frantically searched the shop.

It had been a while, and the Dragonfly he’d tricked still hadn’t shown up. He wondered what was happening on that end, or if something had gone wrong.

But Zhu Yan had no time to dwell on it.

He needed to get upstairs, reach the next destination, and figure out how to deal with Qi Yinming and Yang Zhanbai—preferably by crafting some story.

From a drawer, he found a roll of flashy iridescent wrapping paper.

Just as he was about to start, the ringing of a phone from the corner startled him into turning his head.

It was the old-fashioned brass telephone from the [Print Shop].

Zhu Yan’s heart tightened.

If it was a high-level grotesque calling, opening [Roleplay] wouldn’t do much good.

Still, he was always good at thinking on his feet.

Zhu Yan activated [Roleplay] and picked up the phone.

"Hello? Oh my Paradise! Boss, big trouble!"

That voice—Zhu Yan knew it too well.

Wasn’t it the Dragonfly?

He was still figuring out how to handle it, but the other side didn’t seem to give him a chance to react, spilling everything like beans from a bamboo tube.

"I’m telling you, the [Hunter] stole the menu I made. I’m not taking responsibility for this. As the famous Lazybones, I’m completely dumping this mess on you!"

Zhu Yan pinched his voice to reply, "Fine—"

"Shut up!" Dragonfly spun and danced on the other end. "Listen carefully, you incompetent idiot who can’t do craft work!"

“Aside from mixing ear-report ghost bone powder with gold ink, you also need to set fifty-two kinds of gems around the menu—any kind will do, just make sure it’s fifty-two!”

“If you can’t decide on colors, go with white; pure shades always look good no matter what.”

Dragonfly turned her head to glance at the shop door, which already had the “Closed” sign hanging on it, and streamlined the process as much as possible.

“Paint it however you like—I trust your aesthetic isn’t that bad.”

What the hell?

Wasn’t this Dragonfly supposed to fly off the handle and insist on catching the Hunter?

“As for packaging, use the black drawstring bag from the second-to-last drawer of your desk. Wrap it in several layers, then put it into the black bird-shaped box under the craft table.”

“That’s it. Deliver it to me within an hour, same as always—hand it to that porcelain doll named Xingzi.”

Dragonfly let out a cheerful yet disdainful snort. “I’m closing up to rest. As a proper Lazybones, I’m done meddling in these affairs.”

“If it doesn’t arrive within an hour, you’ll answer for it!”

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