【Short Ramblings】

There is actually a follow-up to the grifter incident, I am dying of laughter. Today he messaged my friend to curse me out.

His exact words were that I had ulterior motives, and that telling my friend to remove the altar was a malicious scheme.

My friend and I are essentially cross-generational friends.

He is much older than me and has a son. Around Chinese New Year, his son's hand suddenly got injured—a bloody accident—and he only told me about it afterwards.

I told him it was exactly because that altar was clashing with him. I did the math, and the timing of the incident matched perfectly.

As a result, the idiot grifter used this as an excuse, spouting nonsense that my friend's son got hurt because they didn't trust him and removed the altar.

I charged right in and started swearing at him. I said you grifters really have your own unique ways of grifting, you dumbass, when his son's hand got hurt, my friend hadn't even contacted me yet.

This grifter panicked, scolded me for not understanding karma and not having my third eye opened, and then suddenly changed his tune and told me not to be superstitious???

Fuck, I actually laughed out loud.

It is that helpless feeling of having too many things to roast but not knowing where to start. What is wrong with this guy? Doesn't he know how edgy and cringey the words third eye sound?

I fucking thought a grifter with any level of professionalism wouldn't use this kind of chuunibyou-exclusive vocabulary???

What the hell. This is exactly like a blind man looking in the mirror, not seeing his own reflection, and stubbornly claiming that gods are formless.

How the fuck is this any different from that idiot who used a feng shui compass like a UFO frisbee?

Oh, speaking of which, that idiot was also ridiculously absurd.

Anyone who knows a bit about the trade knows that a luopan is just a compass. We hold the luopan to measure the mountain directions and palace positions, which are ancient Chinese directional systems.

The directions are divided into eight palaces, named after the Eight Trigrams. Under each trigram, there are three smaller directions; this is called one trigram governing three mountains.

There are 24 such directions in total, known as the Twenty-Four Mountains.

For example, the three smaller directions under the Zhen Palace are Jia, Mao, and Yi. A proper professional calls them Jia Mountain, Mao Mountain, and Yi Mountain. If some dumbass just tells you East, then don't doubt it, that moron is a fraud.

What proper feng shui master says East? The entire Zhen Palace is East, who knows which specific East you are talking about?

For instance, when we say Geng Mountain Jia Facing, it means sitting West and facing East, but it is much more precise than just saying that.

That idiot didn't understand the Twenty-Four Mountains at all. He read too many fucking online fantasy novels and actually thought the luopan was for warding off evil.

How did he evaluate land for people?

He didn't measure directions at all. He just found an empty spot, threw the luopan like a frisbee with a whoosh, and then spouted nonsense to the client: Wherever my luopan lands, that is where the dragon vein is!

Holy shit, bro, that is wild.

Do you even fucking know what a dragon vein is, bro???

This guy even did feng shui for a prefectural-level city mayor. A lot of people actually believed him, and he made absolute bank.

Wild, wild, wild, wild, wild.

I fucking want to go out and scam people too. Bro, your money comes in so fast, can you share some with me?

Oh, of course, there are thousands of these complete idiots; it is impossible to talk about them all in one post.

I have a beautiful older sister who works as an actress in the entertainment industry. It is because of her that I was able to go into showbiz to do feng shui for people.

Fam, that place is what you truly call a mix of fish and fish. It is not a typo for fish and dragons, it is because there are absolutely no fucking dragons in there.

There is only the difference between grass carp, black carp, and silver carp. Are there slightly more expensive fish like sea bass or abalone? No, fam, there aren't.

The stories from showbiz couldn't be finished even if I talked for three days and three nights, three days and three nights.

For example, a few days ago I was chatting with the manager of a top-tier B-list star. She said that before Actress Z started shooting her new project, the producer found a supposedly very effective fellow Taoist to pick an auspicious date and perform a ritual.

On the day of the ritual, this colleague wore a Taoist robe, looking all elegant and majestic.

Halfway through the ritual, it started raining. A short while after the ritual was done, the production crew had an accident and production was halted, and the actress went straight to the top trending searches.

Me: Hahahahahahahahahahahaha.

Colleague, look at this yourself, does this seem right to you.

The mind-blowing level of this gossip is actually the most fucking basic one, there are even more explosive ones.

I can't finish telling them all, fam, and the length of this post is getting pretty long. Let me ask you, if I start a whole new book just writing casually like this, would you guys accept it? (Editor's note: Alright, I wrote it, you guys can move over there to read it, remember to click on the urge-for-updates button)

See you next time, bye-bye. I am endlessly busy tonight too, and I just got my hands on some super massive gossip... I will tell you next time!