Heaven of Love, Sea of Hatred

Jiang Liu walked out of the toilet stall, adjusting his pants.

He strode past Doctor Lin and headed straight back to his hospital room.

Truthfully, he had chased after her to return her phone and car keys.

From a distance, he saw Doctor Lin talking to Jiang Yuzhen, so he hesitated to approach.

But he caught fragments of their conversation.

Piecing it together, it seemed Jiang Yuzhen didn’t want him to regain his memories.

Was it because something bad had happened between them in the past?

Jiang Liu didn’t know.

He really wanted to pull out his phone and ask Li Shenyu about it.

But recalling their previous conversations, Li Shenyu—who acted more like a troublemaking buddy than a girlfriend—hadn’t been particularly insistent on helping him recover his memories either.

Her responses were always along the lines of, "If you forgot, you forgot," or "No need to overthink it."

Jiang Liu wasn’t the paranoid type.

But when two girlfriends suddenly popped up out of nowhere, it was hard not to overthink.

"Where have you been, Jiang Liu?"

He looked up and saw a stranger leaning casually against the doorframe.

His heart skipped a beat for no reason.

Another one?

"Are you also my girlfriend?"

"Don’t talk nonsense in public! I’m your psychology teacher!"

"Oh, my bad, teacher. My brain’s a bit messed up right now—didn’t connect the dots."

Jiang Liu flashed an awkward smile, scratching his head and playing the fool.

"I’ve been too busy with work to visit. Your mom mentioned you lost your memory?"

"Yeah, that’s right. I don’t remember you either..."

"My name is Chen Shuwan. If you’d like, I can fill you in on the past."

Chen Shuwan spoke slowly, her tone gentle and patient.

"No need for that."

Chen Shuwan walked ahead and handed Jiang Liu a book.

He assumed a psychology teacher would give him something like "100 Solutions for Mental Health" or a soothing collection of essays.

Instead, she passed him a copy of Battle Through the Heavens.

Huh?

"After memory loss, it’s best to avoid overthinking. This kind of wish-fulfillment novel is perfect for passing time without straining your brain."

Chen Shuwan smiled warmly and added,

"Overthinking breeds distress. When you forget, you can’t help but dwell on it. That’s why I’m here to ease your worries."

"I’m fine, really. Forgetting might even be a good thing." Jiang Liu had repeated this line so often it felt rehearsed.

"Your eyes darting to the right betray you. I can tell memory loss hasn’t been easy for you."

Her voice was so soothing it reminded Jiang Liu of sunlight glinting off snow.

He took a moment to study her appearance.

Her outfit exuded a calming aura—a black dress with folded floral detailing at the collar, a style he vaguely recognized as "new Chinese." Her fair, porcelain skin seemed to glow under the sunlight.

Around 165 cm tall, her proportions were elegant without being imposing.

Elegance in simplicity, he thought.

A classical beauty.

Her loose hair and bare face even made him think of an odd phrase:

Born with the aura of a widow saint.

Chen Shuwan patiently endured his scrutiny, waiting for his gaze to refocus before speaking again.

"No need to be so tense. We’ve shared a bed—what’s there to be nervous about?"

"Huh?!"

Jiang Liu’s hair practically stood on end.

And she says she’s not my girlfriend!

Chen Shuwan glanced at him, her microexpressions flickering before she turned away, as if she’d already pieced everything together.

But she said nothing.

Instead, she began unpacking his hospital belongings, tossing out used pajamas and a water cup before he could protest.

"In my hometown, it’s tradition to discard everything used during hospitalization upon discharge. Internet slang would call it ‘cutting ties with your sick self’—a little ritual for good luck."

"But I liked that cup..."

"So at least two visitors have claimed to be your girlfriend, huh?"

"Wait, yeah, but—"

Jiang Liu was utterly baffled, his honesty spilling out before he could stop himself.

How did she switch topics so fast?! Weren’t we talking about luggage?!

Chen Shuwan laughed at his bewildered expression.

"Relax, I just wanted to coax the truth out of you. My apologies. Feel free to ask me anything in return."

"It’s fine, but how did you know about the two girlfriends?"

"At least two. Otherwise, why would you assume every new visitor was one?"

Jiang Liu didn’t argue. His mind was stuck on the shared a bed comment.

Does this mean I’m not a virgin anymore?

"You said I could ask anything, right? Then I wanna know—"

"Yes, we shared a bed. But no, we didn’t do that."

"Wha—?! I wasn’t even thinking that!"

Chen Shuwan seemed to enjoy his flustered reactions. She held his gaze and continued,

"But your eyes dropped to my thighs the moment I confirmed it. Knowing you, there’s a 90% chance your brain went straight to imagining them hooked over your shoulders—"

"STOP TALKING!"

Jiang Liu felt like someone had installed a live feed in his brain, with a professional commentator narrating every thought.

If this were an NBA broadcast, the moment he imagined a dunk, the commentator would shout, "Ooh, nice shot!"

"Now your eyes are drifting upward. Let me guess—thinking ‘nice shot’?"

"I am not some pervert!"

As he spoke, his gaze involuntarily followed her words.

Slender branches bearing ripe fruit… Definitely a nice shot.

The awkward tension dissolved, leaving only a red-faced virgin and a woman grinning like a cat.

"Alright, enough teasing. I really am here for counseling."

Jiang Liu nodded, still flushed.

He doubted this "thighs-on-shoulders" and "nice shot" psychologist could offer anything serious.

But then his embarrassment froze.

Her next words left him stunned, his expression blank with realization:

"Memory loss doesn’t feel good, does it? Like a hardworking man suddenly locked out of his safe—no matter how he hacks or pries, the money stays hidden."

Jiang Liu nodded silently.

"The doctors say not to dwell on it, but the feeling is unbearable."

Deep down, he was miserable.

He only forgot that particular part of his memories, yet now, at this very moment, it all came rushing back to him.

Chen Shuwan listened quietly as Jiang Liu spoke, never interrupting or fighting for control of the conversation.

She was a proper psychologist.

For a moment, Jiang Liu even felt that Chen Shuwan seemed more like a doctor than that bastard Doctor Lin.

She listened attentively, and when she heard Jiang Liu’s confusion, she smiled softly:

"That’s exactly why it’s kept in a safe. Loose change for the bus goes in your pocket, daily expenses go in your payment apps, savings stay in your bank account—but precious jewelry, gold, and luxury items? Those go in the safe.

Because they’re precious, they’re painful."

Precious? Yes, precious.

Though the feelings Li Shenyu and Jiang Yuzhen brought him were entirely different, Jiang Liu believed the time he had spent with them must have been extraordinary.

And wasn’t extraordinary just another word for precious?

"Selective amnesia is your body’s defense mechanism kicking in. If it’s protecting you, it means those memories hurt you enough to reach a breaking point. So forgetting might be a good thing.

The words ‘boundless love’ and ‘bottomless hatred’ are intertwined. Sometimes, boundless love is just bottomless hatred. The more you love, the more you doubt—and doubt breeds resentment.

But ‘precious’ is just an adjective, a contrast to the ordinary. Does precious always mean beautiful?"

Jiang Liu mostly understood.

After all, Doctor Lin had also explained the theory of selective amnesia.

But with Doctor Lin’s face in front of him, he just couldn’t focus.

If only Chen Shuwan had been the one lecturing from the start!

Soothing to hear!

A joy to listen to!

Honestly, hearing these words made Jiang Liu feel much better.

But then a new question struck him:

"By your logic, does that mean there’s also ‘boundless love and bottomless hatred’ between us?"

"This..."

Chen Shuwan visibly hesitated, her serene expression flickering for just an instant.

She instinctively raised a hand toward her nose but forced it back down:

"Everyone interprets sorrow and hatred differently."

"Doctor, I’m not some terrible person, am I?"

"What happened before doesn’t matter. The important thing is for you to relax and not dwell on it too much."

There it was again—that kind of response!

Jiang Liu jolted as if triggered by a keyword.

Why did he feel like her expression had turned uneasy?

"Are you sure there wasn’t some ‘boundless love and bottomless hatred’ between us?"